JBond's Top Ten Thread

**JBond** · 01-05-2011, 09:34 PM

Yep, it's my turn. For my first list, I bring you to the top 10 most interesting rules in the official MLB rule book. (In my opinion)

I know what you're thinking: "only 10?!? I demand MORE official baseball rules!" Ha ha, don't worry, these will do fine.

Top 10 Most Interesting Official Rules of MLB

(ed. 2008)

(Honorable Mention)

7.08 (h) – Any runner is out when he passes a preceding runner before such runner is out.

10.

4.03 (c) – Except the pitcher and the catcher, any player may station himself anywhere in fair territory.

(This may seem obvious in retrospect, but it brings to mind interesting possible position scenarios.)

9.

6.06 (b) – A batter is out for illegal action when he steps from one batter’s box to the other while the pitcher is in position ready to pitch.

(Still, I’d love to see someone attempt this mid-windup)

8.

GENERAL INSTRUCTIONS TO THE UMPIRE – You no doubt are going to make mistakes, but never attempt to “even up” after having made one. Make all decisions as you see them and forget which is the home or visiting club.

(No doubt.)

7.

3.09 – Players in uniform shall not address or mingle with spectators, nor sit in the stands before, during, or after the game. No manager, coach or player shall address any spectator before or during a game. Players of opposing teams shall not fraternize at any time while in uniform.

(Interesting, considering this rule is broken multiple times in every single game.)

6.

1.11 (e) - No part of the uniform shall include a pattern that imitates or suggests the shape of a baseball.

5.

6.07 (d) Comment: The umpire shall not direct the attention of any person to the presence in the batter’s box of an improper batter. This rule is designed to require constant vigilance by the players and managers of both teams.

(There’s also this funny rule about how an improper batter becomes a proper batter if he is allowed to reach or is put out, and the line-up then has to follow the next guy in the line-up, but I didn’t want to type it all out. Basically, if no one notices, you could rearrange your lineup mid-inning to have the same guy bat almost back-to-back. ...Back-to-back would be pushing it.)

4.

8.05 (i) – If there is a runner, or runners, it is a balk when the pitcher, without having the ball, stands on or astride the pitcher’s plate or while off the plate, he feints a pitch.

(That’s right, the “oldest trick in the book,” the “Hidden Ball Trick” from “Rookie of the Year,” is bogus. Still, it’s more believable than the Cubs going to the World Series.)

3.

4.09 – HOW A TEAM SCORES – Comment: APPROVED RULLING: Two out, bases full, batter hits a home run over fence. Batter, on appeal, is declared out for missing first base. Three outs. No run counts.

(You miss first base on a grand slam trot, you lose 4 runs. Ouch. That’s a bit steep.)

2.

2.00 – Any reference in these Official Baseball Rules to “he,” “him” or “his” shall be deemed to be a reference to “she,” “her” or “hers,” as the case may be, when the person is a female.

(I dream of the day.)

1.

7.08 (i) – Any runner is out when after he has acquired legal possession of a base, he runs the bases in reverse order for the purpose of confusing the defense or making a travesty of the game. The umpire shall immediately call “Time” and declare the runner out.

(Best sentence ever.)

Deexan · 01-05-2011, 09:56 PM

Hard to argue with any of those.

**JBond** · 01-05-2011, 10:54 PM

That is ten times more enthusiasm than I expected from anybody.

thebtskink · 01-05-2011, 11:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JBond

(Honorable Mention)

7.08 (h) – Any runner is out when he passes a preceding runner before such runner is out.

I remember watching the Red Sox game when Gabe Kapler tore his Achilles' Tendon by stepping on second base incorrectly as he was running in after the man behind him hit a homerun. In order to correctly account for the run, the other guy who hit the homerun (wish I remember who) had to stay on first base for 10-15 minutes while the medical staff attended to Kapler.

Quote:

8.

GENERAL INSTRUCTIONS TO THE UMPIRE – You no doubt are going to make mistakes, but never attempt to “even up” after having made one. Make all decisions as you see them and forget which is the home or visiting club.

(No doubt.)

This rule should be in effect for more sport. Football and basketball have the more egregious examples of an official blatently making up for a bad call against one team by making a bad call against another.

Quote:

Players of opposing teams shall not fraternize at any time while in uniform.

(Interesting, considering this rule is broken multiple times in every single game.)

I assume this rule is a product of post-black sox worries of collusion to throw games, and they haven't really gotten around to changing the wording. An ump would only call this infraction if there were blatent collusion going on.

Quote:

4.

8.05 (i) – If there is a runner, or runners, it is a balk when the pitcher, without having the ball, stands on or astride the pitcher’s plate or while off the plate, he feints a pitch.

Key caveat there--and one that think is as much BS as some of the minor flinching by lineman gets called a false start--is that "feinting a pitch" involves anything that is interpreted as the ump as beginning a pitching motion, then stopping that motion. If a pitcher goes into the stretch, in order to check the runner at first doesn't he have to bring his leading foot all the way back to tap the mound before he can make a throw to first?

Quote:

2.

2.00 – Any reference in these Official Baseball Rules to “he,” “him” or “his” shall be deemed to be a reference to “she,” “her” or “hers,” as the case may be, when the person is a female.

(I dream of the day.)

Integration is not going to happen in the 4 major American sports. The audience just isn't there, for reasons of bigotry, concerns about competition, whatever. The last bid that went anywhere was Manon Rhaume for the Tampa Bay Lightning in 1992, and she only played two presason games.

thebtskink · 01-05-2011, 11:52 PM

Yes, I'm aware of Eri Yoshida. I was only counting women who had made it to a major-league team, but I suppose she's a more recent story of moderate success

Dracula · 01-06-2011, 12:15 AM

So, like, you didn't have to read the official rules of baseball line by line to find these... right?

Dhamon22 · 01-06-2011, 09:59 AM

Good stuff.

ViRUs · 01-06-2011, 11:21 AM

Thats funny, I never knew of #6.

chewie · 01-06-2011, 12:24 PM

I love how #1 is worded "a travesty of the game"

**JBond** · 01-06-2011, 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dracula

So, like, you didn't have to read the official rules of baseball line by line to find these... right?

Oh, I already read the whole thing and highlighted the parts I liked to later tell my sister. All I had to do this time was go through the highlighted parts (30 or so) and mark them down.

So, "yes."

Quote:

Originally Posted by chewie

I love how #1 is worded "a travesty of the game"

"Travesty" is why it's at #1.

FranklinTard · 01-06-2011, 10:59 PM

wait, you have a physical copy of the mlb rulebook?

**JBond** · 01-06-2011, 11:59 PM

Yep. Paper and everything. You now know my hidden shame.

FranklinTard · 01-07-2011, 12:36 AM

i respect the passion.

is it all official like?

i didn't even know they made those.

thebtskink · 01-07-2011, 12:39 AM

Holy crap, I didn't know they made those either

**JBond** · 01-07-2011, 12:49 AM

I got it on Amazon for about $10. It's an official copy. It's hard to explain what interested me about reading it. Something nerdy, I assume.

Ramplate · 01-07-2011, 05:38 AM

I think you can find the official rules online too

thebtskink · 01-07-2011, 07:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ramplate

I think you can find the official rules online too

Official Rules Handbook. The best part about this being available online for free is that Jibbs is out $10 for no good reason.

Ramplate · 01-07-2011, 09:21 AM

my point exactly

And I don't think a $10 order gets free shipping either if I'm not mistaken

Dracula · 01-07-2011, 09:41 AM

that's a lot of pages...

**JBond** · 01-07-2011, 01:15 PM

Next I'm going to do a Top Ten of the funniest scenes in film history. But first, some disclaimers:

Doing a top 10 list of the funniest MOVIES would be tough and full of controversy...doing the top 10 funniest SCENES is impossible. Do I go for what makes me laugh the most personally and laugh every time I see it? Do I show scenes that I know are universally loved as well? Or do I find funny scenes that represent series well (silent period, Marx Brothers, Monty Python, Zucker and Abrahms) or possibly funny actors.

I suppose I did all three to some extent. Mostly, these are scenes that make me split a gut and the best that YOU can hope for is to laugh as well. Because let's face it, people are going to be upset by stuff I left out.

But to be fair to me, I did my best and looked at lists online of "funniest scenes ever." (Though honestly, I already had about 15 in mind, and after looking through this huge AMC list, I only added one more.)

Oh, and one more thing, only ONE of them is from a movie made after 1990. Sorry. Some movies still make me laugh and I looked at a bunch of them closely, but as for a top 10 SCENE, I just couldn't find any. I'm sure I missed some though.

Top Ten Funniest Movie Scenes

Why include so many Honorable Mentions when this is a Top 10 list and not a Top 13 list? It took me a while to find these YouTube clips and laughing is fun, so, too bad.

Honorable Mentions

Monty Python and the Holy Grail – Black Knight

(Spoilers: More Holy Grail to come)

VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:

Dr. Strangelove – Phone call to Russian President

(I remembered this being funnier before I watched it again, so I sent it to the Honorable Mentions.)

VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:

Brazil – Cubicle Scene (6:45 - 8:45)

(Sorry, you have to fastforward it to 6:45.)

VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:

IanTheCool · 01-07-2011, 06:18 PM

Sweet.

**JBond** · 01-07-2011, 09:40 PM

10.

Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade – No Ticket

(Sometimes the funniest scenes come from comic relief. More contrast, I suppose.)

VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:

9.

Monty Python and the Holy Grail – Running Scene

(I wanted to put this higher, but that would have been bias. It's very possible that people don't find this as funny as me, but God help me if I didn't put it on the list anyway. It's just genius.)

VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:

IanTheCool · 01-08-2011, 09:36 AM

I was just thinking of the running scene the other day. That is a great one.

**JBond** · 01-08-2011, 12:33 PM

8.

Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery - Mustafa

(They won't get more modern than this. Those that didn't grow up during this time might not realize this scene was quoted verbatim to people at school.)

VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:

7.

Naked Gun - Drebin as Umpire

(This clip might fall under the "Had to represent Leslie Nielsen" category. It might not be the funniest scene in the series, but it's close and Naked Gun had to get in here.)

VIDEO-CLick to Watch!:

Starwars411 · 01-08-2011, 02:57 PM

I remember when I first watched the Running Scene from Holy Grail and could not stop laughing for about 5 minutes. Such a classic scene.

01-05-2011, 09:56 PM	#2
Deexan Integral Join Date: Aug 2003 Posts: 10,329	Hard to argue with any of those. __________________ What's the law but a leash? SoundCloud Twitter

01-05-2011, 10:54 PM	#3
JBond Feed me Join Date: May 2000 Location: SR388 Posts: 67,502	That is ten times more enthusiasm than I expected from anybody. __________________ The due date for Round 135 of the CS Film Club is Monday, May 20th, 2013. 59 out of 64 Hugo Award winners completed. "Die Hard 5 makes Die Hard 4 look like Die Hard 1" - Doomsday

01-05-2011, 11:52 PM	#5
thebtskink PUT THE LOTION IN THE BASKET Join Date: Jul 2000 Posts: 9,463	Yes, I'm aware of Eri Yoshida. I was only counting women who had made it to a major-league team, but I suppose she's a more recent story of moderate success __________________ It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.

01-06-2011, 09:59 AM	#7
Dhamon22 High Flying Bird Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Parkville, MD Posts: 7,028	Good stuff. __________________ @theoriolereport The Redbox Report Podcast - http://theredboxreport.podbean.com @theredboxreport

01-06-2011, 11:21 AM	#8
ViRUs All for one and one for all! Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 7,304	Thats funny, I never knew of #6. __________________ Til I'm toppling from the top I'm not going to stop, I'm staying on my Monopoly board. That means I'm on top of my game and it dont stop `til my hip dont hop anymore. When you so good you cant say it, `cause it aint even cool for you to sound cocky anymore.

01-05-2011, 09:34 PM	#1
JBond Feed me Join Date: May 2000 Location: SR388 Posts: 67,502	JBond's Top Ten Thread Yep, it's my turn. For my first list, I bring you to the top 10 most interesting rules in the official MLB rule book. (In my opinion) I know what you're thinking: "only 10?!? I demand MORE official baseball rules!" Ha ha, don't worry, these will do fine. Top 10 Most Interesting Official Rules of MLB (ed. 2008) (Honorable Mention) 7.08 (h) – Any runner is out when he passes a preceding runner before such runner is out. 10. 4.03 (c) – Except the pitcher and the catcher, any player may station himself anywhere in fair territory. (This may seem obvious in retrospect, but it brings to mind interesting possible position scenarios.) 9. 6.06 (b) – A batter is out for illegal action when he steps from one batter’s box to the other while the pitcher is in position ready to pitch. (Still, I’d love to see someone attempt this mid-windup) 8. GENERAL INSTRUCTIONS TO THE UMPIRE – You no doubt are going to make mistakes, but never attempt to “even up” after having made one. Make all decisions as you see them and forget which is the home or visiting club. (No doubt.) 7. 3.09 – Players in uniform shall not address or mingle with spectators, nor sit in the stands before, during, or after the game. No manager, coach or player shall address any spectator before or during a game. Players of opposing teams shall not fraternize at any time while in uniform. (Interesting, considering this rule is broken multiple times in every single game.) 6. 1.11 (e) - No part of the uniform shall include a pattern that imitates or suggests the shape of a baseball. 5. 6.07 (d) Comment: The umpire shall not direct the attention of any person to the presence in the batter’s box of an improper batter. This rule is designed to require constant vigilance by the players and managers of both teams. (There’s also this funny rule about how an improper batter becomes a proper batter if he is allowed to reach or is put out, and the line-up then has to follow the next guy in the line-up, but I didn’t want to type it all out. Basically, if no one notices, you could rearrange your lineup mid-inning to have the same guy bat almost back-to-back. ...Back-to-back would be pushing it.) 4. 8.05 (i) – If there is a runner, or runners, it is a balk when the pitcher, without having the ball, stands on or astride the pitcher’s plate or while off the plate, he feints a pitch. (That’s right, the “oldest trick in the book,” the “Hidden Ball Trick” from “Rookie of the Year,” is bogus. Still, it’s more believable than the Cubs going to the World Series.) 3. 4.09 – HOW A TEAM SCORES – Comment: APPROVED RULLING: Two out, bases full, batter hits a home run over fence. Batter, on appeal, is declared out for missing first base. Three outs. No run counts. (You miss first base on a grand slam trot, you lose 4 runs. Ouch. That’s a bit steep.) 2. 2.00 – Any reference in these Official Baseball Rules to “he,” “him” or “his” shall be deemed to be a reference to “she,” “her” or “hers,” as the case may be, when the person is a female. (I dream of the day.) 1. 7.08 (i) – Any runner is out when after he has acquired legal possession of a base, he runs the bases in reverse order for the purpose of confusing the defense or making a travesty of the game. The umpire shall immediately call “Time” and declare the runner out. (Best sentence ever.) __________________ The due date for Round 135 of the CS Film Club is Monday, May 20th, 2013. 59 out of 64 Hugo Award winners completed. "Die Hard 5 makes Die Hard 4 look like Die Hard 1" - Doomsday Last edited by JBond; 01-05-2011 at 09:37 PM.

01-06-2011, 12:15 AM	#6
Dracula Bloodgod Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Minneapolis, MN Posts: 15,111	So, like, you didn't have to read the official rules of baseball line by line to find these... right? __________________ Check out my review blog

01-06-2011, 12:24 PM	#9
chewie Flag on the Moon Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Kansas Posts: 9,503	I love how #1 is worded "a travesty of the game" __________________ Loser Status Confirmed

01-06-2011, 10:59 PM	#11
FranklinTard Damn,ThatsAColdAssHonkey Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 15,729	wait, you have a physical copy of the mlb rulebook? __________________ Of all the preposterous assumptions of humanity over humanity, nothing exceeds most of the criticisms made on the habits of the poor by the well-housed, well- warmed, and well-fed. -Herman Melville (1819 - 1891)

01-06-2011, 11:59 PM	#12
JBond Feed me Join Date: May 2000 Location: SR388 Posts: 67,502	Yep. Paper and everything. You now know my hidden shame. __________________ The due date for Round 135 of the CS Film Club is Monday, May 20th, 2013. 59 out of 64 Hugo Award winners completed. "Die Hard 5 makes Die Hard 4 look like Die Hard 1" - Doomsday

01-07-2011, 12:36 AM	#13
FranklinTard Damn,ThatsAColdAssHonkey Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 15,729	i respect the passion. is it all official like? i didn't even know they made those. __________________ Of all the preposterous assumptions of humanity over humanity, nothing exceeds most of the criticisms made on the habits of the poor by the well-housed, well- warmed, and well-fed. -Herman Melville (1819 - 1891)

01-07-2011, 12:39 AM	#14
thebtskink PUT THE LOTION IN THE BASKET Join Date: Jul 2000 Posts: 9,463	Holy crap, I didn't know they made those either __________________ It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.

01-07-2011, 12:49 AM	#15
JBond Feed me Join Date: May 2000 Location: SR388 Posts: 67,502	I got it on Amazon for about $10. It's an official copy. It's hard to explain what interested me about reading it. Something nerdy, I assume. __________________ The due date for Round 135 of the CS Film Club is Monday, May 20th, 2013. 59 out of 64 Hugo Award winners completed. "Die Hard 5 makes Die Hard 4 look like Die Hard 1" - Doomsday

01-07-2011, 05:38 AM	#16
Ramplate Muwahahaha!...Hamster. Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 25,666	I think you can find the official rules online too __________________ "When I said 'nuke the Chinese' I meant put the take out in the microwave!" "We're not spies, mate. I don't even speak Russian." "What?" "I don't...Am I speaking Russian? How come I'm speaking Russian?"

01-07-2011, 09:21 AM	#18
Ramplate Muwahahaha!...Hamster. Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 25,666	my point exactly And I don't think a $10 order gets free shipping either if I'm not mistaken __________________ "When I said 'nuke the Chinese' I meant put the take out in the microwave!" "We're not spies, mate. I don't even speak Russian." "What?" "I don't...Am I speaking Russian? How come I'm speaking Russian?"

01-07-2011, 09:41 AM	#19
Dracula Bloodgod Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Minneapolis, MN Posts: 15,111	that's a lot of pages... __________________ Check out my review blog

01-07-2011, 01:15 PM	#20
JBond Feed me Join Date: May 2000 Location: SR388 Posts: 67,502	Next I'm going to do a Top Ten of the funniest scenes in film history. But first, some disclaimers: Doing a top 10 list of the funniest MOVIES would be tough and full of controversy...doing the top 10 funniest SCENES is impossible. Do I go for what makes me laugh the most personally and laugh every time I see it? Do I show scenes that I know are universally loved as well? Or do I find funny scenes that represent series well (silent period, Marx Brothers, Monty Python, Zucker and Abrahms) or possibly funny actors. I suppose I did all three to some extent. Mostly, these are scenes that make me split a gut and the best that YOU can hope for is to laugh as well. Because let's face it, people are going to be upset by stuff I left out. But to be fair to me, I did my best and looked at lists online of "funniest scenes ever." (Though honestly, I already had about 15 in mind, and after looking through this huge AMC list, I only added one more.) Oh, and one more thing, only ONE of them is from a movie made after 1990. Sorry. Some movies still make me laugh and I looked at a bunch of them closely, but as for a top 10 SCENE, I just couldn't find any. I'm sure I missed some though. Top Ten Funniest Movie Scenes Why include so many Honorable Mentions when this is a Top 10 list and not a Top 13 list? It took me a while to find these YouTube clips and laughing is fun, so, too bad. Honorable Mentions Monty Python and the Holy Grail – Black Knight (Spoilers: More Holy Grail to come) VIDEO-CLick to Watch!: Dr. Strangelove – Phone call to Russian President (I remembered this being funnier before I watched it again, so I sent it to the Honorable Mentions.) VIDEO-CLick to Watch!: Brazil – Cubicle Scene (6:45 - 8:45) (Sorry, you have to fastforward it to 6:45.) VIDEO-CLick to Watch!: __________________ The due date for Round 135 of the CS Film Club is Monday, May 20th, 2013. 59 out of 64 Hugo Award winners completed. "Die Hard 5 makes Die Hard 4 look like Die Hard 1" - Doomsday Last edited by JBond; 01-07-2011 at 01:19 PM.

01-07-2011, 06:18 PM	#21
IanTheCool Executive Lego Producer Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Canada Posts: 13,395	Sweet.

01-07-2011, 09:40 PM	#22
JBond Feed me Join Date: May 2000 Location: SR388 Posts: 67,502	10. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade – No Ticket (Sometimes the funniest scenes come from comic relief. More contrast, I suppose.) VIDEO-CLick to Watch!: 9. Monty Python and the Holy Grail – Running Scene (I wanted to put this higher, but that would have been bias. It's very possible that people don't find this as funny as me, but God help me if I didn't put it on the list anyway. It's just genius.) VIDEO-CLick to Watch!: __________________ The due date for Round 135 of the CS Film Club is Monday, May 20th, 2013. 59 out of 64 Hugo Award winners completed. "Die Hard 5 makes Die Hard 4 look like Die Hard 1" - Doomsday

01-08-2011, 09:36 AM	#23
IanTheCool Executive Lego Producer Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Canada Posts: 13,395	I was just thinking of the running scene the other day. That is a great one.

01-08-2011, 12:33 PM	#24
JBond Feed me Join Date: May 2000 Location: SR388 Posts: 67,502	8. Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery - Mustafa (They won't get more modern than this. Those that didn't grow up during this time might not realize this scene was quoted verbatim to people at school.) VIDEO-CLick to Watch!: 7. Naked Gun - Drebin as Umpire (This clip might fall under the "Had to represent Leslie Nielsen" category. It might not be the funniest scene in the series, but it's close and Naked Gun had to get in here.) VIDEO-CLick to Watch!: __________________ The due date for Round 135 of the CS Film Club is Monday, May 20th, 2013. 59 out of 64 Hugo Award winners completed. "Die Hard 5 makes Die Hard 4 look like Die Hard 1" - Doomsday

01-08-2011, 02:57 PM	#25
Starwars411 Darth Smith Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Charleston, WV Posts: 5,294	I remember when I first watched the Running Scene from Holy Grail and could not stop laughing for about 5 minutes. Such a classic scene.