JBond
10-15-2001, 04:31 PM
Here it is, the best of Bar Room brawl that I once posted a long time ago. it still has the orignal dopey commentary by me.
Jedi Knight: 10-13-2000 11:04 PM
This was the creator and time the first post was made. Before this thread was made, you could catch tumbleweed going across the Community forums! Jedi Knight had made it popular with it, which later led to stuff like the Dance thread, etc.
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JBond: 10-14-2000 09:59 PM
So he takes Jedi's Lightsaber, and is just about to engage when he finds that the lightsaber doesn't work!! He opens the bottom of the lightsaber and realizes that Jedi bought the generic brand of batteries! He should of went with Energizer, they keep going, and going...
I think this was funny!
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JBond: 10-15-2000 12:17 PM
Arnold throws a chair at Jedi, he uses his force to make it miss (not knowing it hit William Shatner just entering the bar)
First post to contain William Shatner
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Superman: 10-15-2000 03:40 PM
Superman finds the nuke and flies to the bar, he watches Jedi Knight and Predator fight with a wounded and delusional Shatner moaning "There is no place like home," and "hey hey we're the Moneky's!" Not knowing which situation is worse, Superman finally decides that he has to save the people from Shatner's words and takes him to a hospital
First post to make fun of Shatner, also very funny!
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Superman: posted 10-15-2000 06:03 PM
As the three heroes decide to go to their own movies, Superman realizes something odd about JBond after his encounter with the Raptors. It appears his left leg is in place of his left arm and his left arm is in place of his left leg because he was stitched in a rush job. Superman decides to see how long it takes for JBond to realize this.
First post to make fun of JBond, somehow, everyone including me continued with it!
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Jedi Knight: 10-15-2000 08:52 PM
"Hey, wait a minute...!" Jedi screams out to the Lizard. But its too late, Godzilla crushes the car as he sits down upon it.
"Oh, great! Thanks a lot you stupid Jurassic Park rip off! You just smashed my Rent-A Car!" Jedi screams at the idiot monster.
Very funny!
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Superman: posted 10-16-2000 10:06 PM
Jedi Knight: So how do we find Yoda?
Superman: Last I heard he was pimpin downtown with E.T.
Also very funny!
Superman: 10-17-2000 06:48 PM
Cab screeches to a sudden halt, and at the same time JBond is seen flying over the cab due to the force of the halt he falls in front of the cab.
More unnecessary beating of me! :)
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JBond: posted 10-17-2000 09:05 PM
Jedi: Hey, Yoda, I need a new lightsaber.
Yoda: What do I look like, a #$%@ing convenient store?! You have to fill out a form, pay me $500, and pick it up in a few weeks, you do.
(Jedi start's to choke Yoda)
Superman: Jedi! What are you doing?!
Jedi: Give! Me! My! Lightsaber!
Yoda: Fine! *Voooooooooom* (Yoda turns on his lightsaber)
(Dramatic music starts, lights dim, someone from the side passes Jedi a lightsaber, and Yoda and Jedi get into duel)
JBond: So, Superman, how are you doing!
Superman: Fine, Fine.
I thought this funny, so sue me!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-17-2000 09:15 PM
Suddenly the three heroes sight....A GIANT WILLIAM SHATNER!
Superman: Holy cow!
*Shatner starts to shake like he's having a seizure*
Shatner: KHAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!!
Jedi Knight: We've gotta stop him! He's causing an earthquake!
First post that makes William Shatner an Enemy which lead to a lot more fun. Also very funny!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-17-2000 10:30 PM
Shatner: "Your just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off of you..."
JBond: Aaaaaarrrrgggghhhhh! My ears!
JBond stumbles and falls to the ground; covering his ears.
Jedi goes for the phaser and fires at Shatner. The phaser stuns Shatner, who falls to the ground; KO'ed.
Superman: Get up, Bond, you idiot. Shatner's down.
JBond: *dusts off his tux* Uh, yeah. I knew that.
Jedi: Suuuurrrre.
Very funny!
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Superman: posted 10-18-2000 07:46 PM
Superman: Man I knew Shatner would finally lose it! The man was cursing like a sailor the last time I saw him, can't say I didn't see it coming.
JBond: Maybe he cracked when Jedi here used Shatner's credit card number for a certain 1-900 number...
Jedi Knight: Hey! That was part of my investigation to locate Yoda.
JBond: Investigation? More like probing...
Superman: <uses X-Ray vision on the females> Heh...
JBond: Enjoying yourself?
Superman: You don't know the half of it.
Very funny!
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JBond: posted 10-19-2000 11:04 AM
Jedi: Any-Hoo, I think...OH MY GOD, LOOK!
Superman: Oh for Christ sake, now what?!?
Is there...
A) A pissed Frank Oz with a machete
B) A pissed Trinity with an automatic
C) A pissed Steven Spielberg with a bill
D) A happy Star Trek crew with party hats and cake
First post to use a multiple choice ending, it lasted for awhile but eventually went away.
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Superman: posted 10-19-2000 05:32 PM
Superman: Alright a party with food, I'm starved dudes. Lets go scarf some pizzas and hang 10 on some killer waves.
JBond: He's gotta stop watching the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Jedi Knight: Yeah well...
Trekkie 1: Hey are you Star Trek fans because this party is only restricted to fans of the Captain Kirk series and movies.
Superman: Uh yeah... That's us!
JBond: Man we have entered geek world.
Jedi Knight: Man the last time I entered geek world was at JBond's place this morning when he...
JBond: Hey!
Trekkie 1: Are you sure you guys are Trekkie fans <adjusts his glasses that are held by a piece of masking tape in the middle>
Superman: Sure we are!
Trekkie 2: Prove it!
Superman: How?
Trekkie 2: What was "Star Trek 2" about?
Superman: Oh I know, that's the one where whiny kid finds out his dad is some evil dictator and he gets his hand chopped off.
JBond: NO!
Jedi Knight: <looks down, closes eyes and shakes his head>
Superman: What? What'd I say?
JBond: You idiot that was Star Wars not Star Trek!
Superman: Ah I see, was there an evil emperor in that one too with an asthma problem.
Jedi Knight: No, and if you want to find out the difference between the two get ready for a battle. These nerds are about to take us down!
<The Tekkies advance towards our heroes ready to take them down, Jedi Knight pulls out his light saber and Bond pulls out his stun gun>
JBond: You suck Superman, you have no damn idea!
Superman: Hey its not as bad as the time Jedi Knight used salt instead of sugar for the cake we were making for John McCalne.
Jedi Knight: *snickers as he's getting ready to fight* Oh yeah, that was damn funny...
<The Trekkies advance in a group, a group of 5 charges Jedi Knight as he uses a mind trick to make them believe that there would be no special edition DVD's of any Star Trek movie>
<Meanwhile Bond uses his stun gun and caddle prod to fight off a group of 4, while Superman keeps pushing the faces of the Trekkies into the cake>
Superman: Cakes taste's good!
Jedi Knight: Hey save some of that for me <as he continues to fight>
JBond: Coming right up! <puts a piece of cake on the prod and launches it to Jedi Knight>
Jedi Knight: Thanks! <eats it as he cuts the belt of a very large Trekkie who loses his pants>
Superman: <continues to stuff the Trekkies face in cake> Next time you should bring some Kryptonite if you want to take me down!
All the sudden a rumble is heard and a shadow looms over our heroes in battle. Is it:
A). An alien spaceship again.
B). Marlon Brando
C). A revived Godzilla
D). Steven Segal currently in his lard incarnation.
HILARIOUS post!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-20-2000 08:19 PM
Suddenly the three heroes sight Roseanne running through the street, roaring like an animal.
Roseanne: I'm gooonna eat ya!
Agent Smith: Ooooookaaaayyyyyy! Well, I'm outta here!
Agent Smith jets off.
Also hilarious! (notice this is ALL in a week of posting!)
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Superman: posted 10-24-2000 05:47 PM
Trix Rabbit: <Pulls out a switch blade> I'll hurt you so bad you'll be screaming for your mother!
The image of this is just hilarious!
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JBond: 10-24-2000 08:12 PM
JBond: A Tornado you say! This looks like a job for...Bond!
(Bond starts to shoot at the tornado with his PPK)
Jedi: Uhhh, what are you doing?
JBond: Shh! Not now! *Bang* *Bang*
Superman: Whatever. I got a better idea!
A. Superman destroys the Weather Center so a tornado could not possibly continue
B. Superman runs like a little school girl
C. Superman calls Helen Hunt and Bill Paxton over
D. Superman throws Shatner into the tornado, hoping that's in ample sacrifice
This was my first post in a few days, I thought it was pretty funny!
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Superman: posted 10-24-2000 09:36 PM
Priest: Do you Venom take Jessica Alba to be your wife.
Venom: I do!!
Priest: Jessica Alba, do you take Venom as your husband.
Jessica Alba: I do!
Priest: I now pronounce you husband and wife!
Superman: Yo Venom snap out of it! <Snaps fingers in front of him>
Venom: Huh?
Superman: Dude I know this traumatic but snap out of it.
RossBond: Hey how come you grabbed Jedi and wanted him as your wife?
Jedi: <Stands in the corner of the room afraid to go near Venom>
Venom: Sorry I must've zoned out...
This was freaking hilarious!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-25-2000 07:41 PM Shatner: Qui Gon never told you about your father.
Jedi: He told me enough. He told me he had a seizure while watching one of your movies!
Shatner: No, Jedi...I am your father.
Jedi falls to his knees.
Jedi: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Where it was said Shatner was Jedi’s father (one of them). Also from a hilarious post!
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JBond: posted 10-25-2000 10:18 PM
C. Jerry Springer doing a show with class
Springer: Yes, I know, let it all out.
Guest: i'm sooo saaaaaad!!
JBond: I've always been disgusted by Jerry Springer, but somehow this is just wrong! I can't STAND IT! Jedi: Have no fear! I'll save it!
(Jedi picks up a chair) Jedi: Stop ******* sniffling you ****** ****, I ******* hate it when ****** ******* cry!!!! Jedi then slams the chair into the guest.
Crowd: Jedi! Jedi! Jedi!
Superman: Let's make it interesting!
(Superman passes guns to half of the people in the crowd)
Superman: That's more like it!
I thought this was funny!
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Superman: posted 10-25-2000 11:14 PM
Jerry: Now Mr. Bond, how do you think the public will view you now. Why did you do this?
JBond: Well Jer, can I call you Jer?
Jerry: Sure you can son.
JBond: Don't call me son.
This was really funny!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-25-2000 11:40 PM
Shatner pulls out a sword and starts showing off some kung fu moves.
Shatner swings the sword and slices the air.
Jedi: (yawning) Your boring me.
Shatner charges at Jedi with the sword.
Shatner: (as he charges) KHANNNNN!!!
Jedi steps out of the way and Shatner slams headfirst into the brick wall behind him.
That was really funny!
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Superman: posted 10-26-2000 04:51 PM
Jedi Knight: Okay so I exaggerated! <All the heroes look at him and step back as the father's approach Jedi Knight> Oh crap! <Jedi looks around and finally has an idea> Hey Mr. Portman, Mr. Geller, and Mr. Moore look a birdie!
The three fathers: Oh where!! <They all look around while the heroes run away including a shirtless JBond>
Superman: So much for the "Jedi mind trick."
Jedi Knight: Worked on you...
Superman: I thought we weren't going to discuss that incident...
Hilarious!
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Superman: posted 10-27-2000 05:25 PM
Venom: I was too drunk to notice.
JBond: I saw it, but then again I see a lot of strange things.
Superman: Yeah like a woman with her clothes on.
JBond: Shut up jackass...
Superman: What did you just call me!
JBond: Nothin!
I love the arguments you make between the members!
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Superman: 10-28-2000 05:35 PM
Anna: Venom, I have something to tell you...
Venom: Yeah yeah yeah, your my sister.
Anna: How did you know!?
Venom: Because Jedi Knight was playing sharades and acting the whole thing out while I was fighting Wolverine.
Anna: Oh…
Bizarre, but that’s what made this really funny!
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Superman: 10-29-2000 01:59 PM
Regis: <Approaches the hero as he's seen wearing a robe> I have a millionn dollar question for you first.
Jedi Knight: What is it?
Regis: Have you ever seen anything like this! <Takes off his robe to reveal he's nude>
Jedi Knight: AHHH ***** I'm blind! <Falls>
Venom: Mother of... <collapses> What... kind of monster... are you...
Regis: The sexiest fat slob!
Jedi Knight: Noooo!!!
Also very funny!
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Superman: posted 10-29-2000 04:10 PM Mickey Mouse: Get the *hic* f--k off of me, your crushing my pecker!
..........ok!
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Superman: posted 10-29-2000 04:10 PM
RossBond: What I don't get it?
Venom: Put 2 + 2 together and you'll get it!
RossBond: 4
Venom: What?
RossBond: 2 + 2 is 4.
Superman: No!
RossBond: It's not 4, I always got 4 when I added 2 + 2.
Superman: No its still 4!
RossBond: Then how come you said it wasn't?
Superman: It is but that's not what he meant.
RossBond: What way is there to mean it, 2 + 2 has always been 4.
Superman: NO!!!
RossBond: You just said it was!
Superman: 5...4...3...2...1... <Runs up to smack Ross when the others pull him off>
Venom: <Pulls Ross over to explain it to him>
JBond: <Shakes his head> We'll never last as an organized team...
Great skit!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-31-2000 10:20 PM
JBond: Okay poeple, we need to get back to the Bar!
All of the heroes rush to a sidewalk to get a cab.
Jedi: Superman, you can fly, remember?
Superman: Oh...yeah <flies off>
Jedi: <shakes his head>
RossBond: TAXI!
Ha ha! That’s great!
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JBond: posted 10-31-2000 10:46 PM
B. Jedi uses a mind trick to make the Shatners think they are chickens
Jedi Knight: posted 11-01-2000 03:16 PM
Shatner: Yummy! Chickens!
Shatner runs after the heroes, trying to eat them.
JBond: posted 11-01-2000 03:37 PM
Jedi...I meant the Shatners think themselves are chickens!!
This was a hilarious mix-up!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-01-2000 10:44 PM
Keanu: Qui Goon never told you about your brother....!
Jedi: Oh please no...!
Keanu: ...I AM YOUR BROTHER!
Jedi: NOOOOOO!!!!!!
THIS! I did not catch... I’m going to have to mention this later......YEAH!!
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Superman: posted 11-02-2000 07:17 PM
RossBond: <Looking out the window> Well um it looks like the Teletubbies are riding on a big cheese wheel in the city, and the Shatner clones are having a breakdancing contest.
Superman: NOOOOOO!!!!
JBond: What!? What!?
Superman: I wanted to be in the breakdancing contest this year. I even sharpened up my moves...
Jedi Knight: <Shakes his head> You know... Forget it, its not even worth commenting on.
Weird...but hilarious!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-04-2000 01:22 PM
ITS THE "STAY PUFF" MARSHMALLOW MAN!
Superman: Whoa!
RossBond: Run, everybody!
The heroes run into an empty Hotel lobby and head to the Elevator.
Venom: We need to get to the roof!
JBond: Uh....why?
Superman: Yeah, why do we need to get to the roof? Were perfectly safe here.
Venom: Uh...we just have to!
Jedi: I'm surrounded by idiots.
Suddenly the Marshmallow man punches his hand through the Hotel door and grabs RossBond!
RossBond: AAAAAHHHH!!!
Venom: We've got to save him!
JBond: Why?
Venom: YOU ASK TOO MANY QUESTIONS!
2 funny things!
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Superman: posted 11-04-2000 02:14 PM
Superman: Hey wait I got an idea! RossBond you up for a snack?
RossBond: Yeah I suppose...
Superman: <Huddles everyone together for the plan>
A few seconds later RossBond runs up to the Marshmallow Man and starts eating his legs which causes him to collapse.
Jedi Knight: That.... That's just plain weird...
JBond: Which is why I have my video camera handy <Films everything>
Bizarre=Funny!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-04-2000 02:37 PM
Then, Roseanne bursts through the door and eats Venom!
JBond: Crap!
JBond runs up the stairs; trying to hide from Roseanne.
Roseanne: I want cooookkkkiiiiiieeeeess!
I just had to put this in here, it’s funny!!
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Superman: posted 11-04-2000 03:37 PM
Superman: Hey if you ever want to remove it I can do it with my heat vision for $50. Here's my card. <Hands RossBond the card>
RossBond: This isn't even a real card! It has a sloppy drawing of your "S" symbol written on the back of a napkin! And the phone number is for Domino's Pizza.
Superman: Can't blame me for trying.
JBond: The problem is you don't try...
Superman: I heard that "Mr. I want my blanky."
JBond: Shhhhh!! There are females present!
Venom: Not that Jedi would know what to do with one...
Jedi Knight: Hey that whole Portman/Moore/Geller incident was settled!
Superman: Yeah by an out of court settlement.
Jedi Knight: Yeah, 30 days of community service shoveling ***** at the farm.
That’s just hilarious!
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Superman: posted 11-04-2000 04:53 PM
Katie Holmes: We're looking for Bond.
RossBond: <Gets up> That would be me!
Rachel Leigh Cook: No, other Bond.
JBond: That would be me <In suave tone>
Jennifer Lopez: Well I'm glad I finally found you... <Slaps him in the face> Quit sending naked pictures of yourself to us or I'll get Puffy after you!
Rachel Leigh Cook: You'll be hearing from out lawyers!
Katie Holmes: My innocence has been shattered...
The three girls leave and everyone looks at Bond.
JBond: <Gives everyone the finger> Show's over!
Superman: It's not even 9am and we have our first lawsuit of the day.
Jedi Knight: Speaking of which we have to review our lawsuits for budgetery reasons. We need to know how much money we have to set aside for this. Okay I was sued by three girls, one is a minor.
Venom: Again...
Jedi Knight: Superman, your being sued for flying while intoxicated and indecent exposure while flying...
Superman: <High fives JBond>
JBond: Nice work!!
Jedi Knight: RossBond is being sued by the city for covering it in cheese, and assualting a cab driver with his shoe...
RossBond: So sue me!
Venom: That's exactly what they're doing.
RossBond: Oh...
Jedi Knight: JBond is being sued by those three girls for harassment...
Superman: Naturally.
Jedi Knight: The only one not being sued is Venom.
JBond: Mama's boy!
Venom: <Lifts JBond over his head and tosses him out the bar window> Put me down for assualt and battery and damage to private property.
Jedi Knight: <Takes notes>
I don’t think I saw this last time, it’s hilarious! Against James Bond, but hilarious!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-04-2000 05:25 PM
Jedi takes a seat next to Cook and lays on the pick up lines.
Then Barney enters the room and starts gobbling up all the club's inhabitants!
JBond: This kind of stuff just seems to happen to us, does'nt it?
Superman: I guess so.
Not the first, but one of many posts making fun of the MANY situations the heroes go through!
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Superman: posted 11-04-2000 06:55 PM
Venom: Well we still have a major situation. Baby Bopp, the Teletubbies, Segal, Schumacher, Pikachu...
RossBond: Bless you.
:)
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Superman: posted 11-09-2000 06:17 PM
Superman: <Gets up> Where did the girls come from?
JBond: Some former girls I slept with.
Superman: All 200 of them!?
JBond: Well the other 5,000 couldn't make it.
Superman: Figures.
JBond: So how do we break up Ross and Jedi?
Superman: <Whistles> Ross! Chow time!
RossBond: <Gets up and runs to the table with knife and fork>
Jedi Knight: <Tries to seduce the women that Bond brought but they slap him with a lawsuit>
I thought this was pretty funny!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-10-2000 01:13 PM
Jedi: <pulls out a blaster and blows Kurt Angle, Shatner, and the rest of the city away>
Probably the simplest solution anyone has posted!
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JBond: posted 11-14-2000 06:02 PM
Eastwood: I asked you question, did I give you six dollars, or did I give you five? Maybe i kept a dollar in my wallet. Well? Do you feel lucky, PUNK!
Store Clerk: Uh, Sir. You gave me a fake credit card.
Eastwood: Oh....Gotta go! <Eastwood huffs and puffs while trying to run away>
I thought this was funny! It was also a post that revived the thread from being forgotten!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-18-2000 06:39 PM
Suddenly the heroes spot Chuck Heston blowing away monkeys in the streets with a "borrowed" N.R.A. Tank!
Heston: Take that you blasted dirty apes! <laughs maniacally>
Venom: NNNNOOOO!!!!
Superman: Calm down, man! Are the monkeys friends of yours or something?
Venom: No. This just seemed like the appropriate time to say, 'NNNNNOOOO!!!!'
That’s hilarious!
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Venom2010: posted 12-05-2000 12:09 PM
Venom2010 kills everyone with a machine gun
It sounded like a good idea at the time!
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Jbond: posted 12-08-2000 10:15 AM
Superman: Now. Where are we going again?
JBond: I don't really know! Hold on, let me check page 10.
Superman: Page 10? What are you talking about?
JBond: Oh I found it! We are going to New York to defeat the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man!
Jedi: No,no,no! That's page 6, JBond!
Jbond: Uh, Jedi. I beleive I know what page I'm on!
Jedi: Oh that's right! JBond knows everythiing!!
Jedi: IT'S PAGE 6!!!!
JBond: IT'S PAGE 10!!!!
Jedi: 6
JBond: 10
Jedi: 6!
JBond: 10!
Jedi: 6!!
JBond: 10!!
Jedi: 10!
JBond: 6!
Jedi: Ha HA!
This was my satire of how long and confusing it was all getting, I thought it was pretty funny!
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Superman: posted 12-09-2000 01:30 PM
RossBond: Oh *****... I'm car sick... <Sticks his head out the window and pukes. The vomit hits the Predator ship blocking its view and also the vomit hits the streets making the roads slick. The ship crashes into Wendy's>
Superman: Talk about your drive thrus.
That was a good joke!
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Jedi Knight: posted 12-09-2000 06:58 PM
Suddenly, the heroes spot a figure walking towards them from the wreckage of the Wendy's Restaraunt.
Ross: Hey look! Someone's coming from the smoke...wait a second...ITS DAVE THOMAS!
Dave Thomas walks over to the heroes and mumbles some incoherent drivvle, then dies.
Jedi: What did he just say?
Superman: <Wiping a tear from his eye> I think he said to order the spicy chicken sandwich.
I thought this has just HILARIOUS!!!
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Jedi Knight: posted 12-09-2000 08:02 PM
JBond: Yes! We will ALL eat the spicy chicken sandwich! In honor of...of..
Jedi: Dave Thomas
JBond: Yes! Dave Thomas!
Jedi: I'm in
RossBond: I'm in
Superman: Spicy food gives me ulcers
JBond: Then get some fries
Superman: I'm not really hungry
JBond: Then get a coke!
Superman: My doctor says I should cut down on sugar
JBond: Then blow straw wrappers at people in the resturant!
Superman: Ok! Let's go!
<The heroes look at the resturant>
RossBond: Oh yeah...It was destroyed
...
JBond: On to McDonalds!!
Heroes: Yeah!!!
I thought this was a funny follow-up!
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Superman: posted 12-11-2000 11:13 PM
RossBond: Where did you hide Alf's carcass?
Jedi Knight: In JBond's brief case.
JBond: <Spits out his drink> You reject! There were important documents for my mission in there!!
Superman: Yeah screw numerous women, listen to the villain explain what he's gonna do and that gives you time to kill him. Your tellin me you weren't expecting that to happen.
Once again, Superman making fun of James Bond…but it was still funny!
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JBond: posted 12-14-2000 11:21 AM
You guys HAVE to look at this!!!
WE WON!!!
http://entertainment.msn.com/news/eonline/1214/priceline.asp
This was my post of a link that led to a page that said William Shatner was no longer going to work at priceline.com, it was the end of the Shatner Era! :)
After that, it took us almost a week to come up with Bill Gates being in the story.
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JBond: posted 12-19-2000 02:17 PM
Welcome to the Bill Gates secret factory!!
FLOOR 1: Lobby version 3.11
FLOOR 2: Urkel's labortory of glass, models, and breakable things(closed for repairs)
FLOOR 3: Microsoft: 'Word up!' facility
FLOOR 4: Gates' secret floor (*don't tell anyone*)
This was a sign in a post I made that I thought was funny!
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Jedi Knight: posted 12-20-2000 05:45 PM
· Elmo: <At the Bar counter> Give me another "Bloody Mary," Bob!
· Bar-Tender: Sorry, Elmo. You're going to have to leave now.
· Elmo: But...but...
· Bar-Tender: Man, I think you've had too much to drink. You should leave.
· Elmo: Back up, Bob! <Punches the Bar-Tender back into the wall and runs off>
The image this gives is funny!
Jedi Knight: 10-13-2000 11:04 PM
This was the creator and time the first post was made. Before this thread was made, you could catch tumbleweed going across the Community forums! Jedi Knight had made it popular with it, which later led to stuff like the Dance thread, etc.
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JBond: 10-14-2000 09:59 PM
So he takes Jedi's Lightsaber, and is just about to engage when he finds that the lightsaber doesn't work!! He opens the bottom of the lightsaber and realizes that Jedi bought the generic brand of batteries! He should of went with Energizer, they keep going, and going...
I think this was funny!
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JBond: 10-15-2000 12:17 PM
Arnold throws a chair at Jedi, he uses his force to make it miss (not knowing it hit William Shatner just entering the bar)
First post to contain William Shatner
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Superman: 10-15-2000 03:40 PM
Superman finds the nuke and flies to the bar, he watches Jedi Knight and Predator fight with a wounded and delusional Shatner moaning "There is no place like home," and "hey hey we're the Moneky's!" Not knowing which situation is worse, Superman finally decides that he has to save the people from Shatner's words and takes him to a hospital
First post to make fun of Shatner, also very funny!
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Superman: posted 10-15-2000 06:03 PM
As the three heroes decide to go to their own movies, Superman realizes something odd about JBond after his encounter with the Raptors. It appears his left leg is in place of his left arm and his left arm is in place of his left leg because he was stitched in a rush job. Superman decides to see how long it takes for JBond to realize this.
First post to make fun of JBond, somehow, everyone including me continued with it!
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Jedi Knight: 10-15-2000 08:52 PM
"Hey, wait a minute...!" Jedi screams out to the Lizard. But its too late, Godzilla crushes the car as he sits down upon it.
"Oh, great! Thanks a lot you stupid Jurassic Park rip off! You just smashed my Rent-A Car!" Jedi screams at the idiot monster.
Very funny!
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Superman: posted 10-16-2000 10:06 PM
Jedi Knight: So how do we find Yoda?
Superman: Last I heard he was pimpin downtown with E.T.
Also very funny!
Superman: 10-17-2000 06:48 PM
Cab screeches to a sudden halt, and at the same time JBond is seen flying over the cab due to the force of the halt he falls in front of the cab.
More unnecessary beating of me! :)
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JBond: posted 10-17-2000 09:05 PM
Jedi: Hey, Yoda, I need a new lightsaber.
Yoda: What do I look like, a #$%@ing convenient store?! You have to fill out a form, pay me $500, and pick it up in a few weeks, you do.
(Jedi start's to choke Yoda)
Superman: Jedi! What are you doing?!
Jedi: Give! Me! My! Lightsaber!
Yoda: Fine! *Voooooooooom* (Yoda turns on his lightsaber)
(Dramatic music starts, lights dim, someone from the side passes Jedi a lightsaber, and Yoda and Jedi get into duel)
JBond: So, Superman, how are you doing!
Superman: Fine, Fine.
I thought this funny, so sue me!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-17-2000 09:15 PM
Suddenly the three heroes sight....A GIANT WILLIAM SHATNER!
Superman: Holy cow!
*Shatner starts to shake like he's having a seizure*
Shatner: KHAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!!
Jedi Knight: We've gotta stop him! He's causing an earthquake!
First post that makes William Shatner an Enemy which lead to a lot more fun. Also very funny!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-17-2000 10:30 PM
Shatner: "Your just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off of you..."
JBond: Aaaaaarrrrgggghhhhh! My ears!
JBond stumbles and falls to the ground; covering his ears.
Jedi goes for the phaser and fires at Shatner. The phaser stuns Shatner, who falls to the ground; KO'ed.
Superman: Get up, Bond, you idiot. Shatner's down.
JBond: *dusts off his tux* Uh, yeah. I knew that.
Jedi: Suuuurrrre.
Very funny!
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Superman: posted 10-18-2000 07:46 PM
Superman: Man I knew Shatner would finally lose it! The man was cursing like a sailor the last time I saw him, can't say I didn't see it coming.
JBond: Maybe he cracked when Jedi here used Shatner's credit card number for a certain 1-900 number...
Jedi Knight: Hey! That was part of my investigation to locate Yoda.
JBond: Investigation? More like probing...
Superman: <uses X-Ray vision on the females> Heh...
JBond: Enjoying yourself?
Superman: You don't know the half of it.
Very funny!
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JBond: posted 10-19-2000 11:04 AM
Jedi: Any-Hoo, I think...OH MY GOD, LOOK!
Superman: Oh for Christ sake, now what?!?
Is there...
A) A pissed Frank Oz with a machete
B) A pissed Trinity with an automatic
C) A pissed Steven Spielberg with a bill
D) A happy Star Trek crew with party hats and cake
First post to use a multiple choice ending, it lasted for awhile but eventually went away.
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Superman: posted 10-19-2000 05:32 PM
Superman: Alright a party with food, I'm starved dudes. Lets go scarf some pizzas and hang 10 on some killer waves.
JBond: He's gotta stop watching the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Jedi Knight: Yeah well...
Trekkie 1: Hey are you Star Trek fans because this party is only restricted to fans of the Captain Kirk series and movies.
Superman: Uh yeah... That's us!
JBond: Man we have entered geek world.
Jedi Knight: Man the last time I entered geek world was at JBond's place this morning when he...
JBond: Hey!
Trekkie 1: Are you sure you guys are Trekkie fans <adjusts his glasses that are held by a piece of masking tape in the middle>
Superman: Sure we are!
Trekkie 2: Prove it!
Superman: How?
Trekkie 2: What was "Star Trek 2" about?
Superman: Oh I know, that's the one where whiny kid finds out his dad is some evil dictator and he gets his hand chopped off.
JBond: NO!
Jedi Knight: <looks down, closes eyes and shakes his head>
Superman: What? What'd I say?
JBond: You idiot that was Star Wars not Star Trek!
Superman: Ah I see, was there an evil emperor in that one too with an asthma problem.
Jedi Knight: No, and if you want to find out the difference between the two get ready for a battle. These nerds are about to take us down!
<The Tekkies advance towards our heroes ready to take them down, Jedi Knight pulls out his light saber and Bond pulls out his stun gun>
JBond: You suck Superman, you have no damn idea!
Superman: Hey its not as bad as the time Jedi Knight used salt instead of sugar for the cake we were making for John McCalne.
Jedi Knight: *snickers as he's getting ready to fight* Oh yeah, that was damn funny...
<The Trekkies advance in a group, a group of 5 charges Jedi Knight as he uses a mind trick to make them believe that there would be no special edition DVD's of any Star Trek movie>
<Meanwhile Bond uses his stun gun and caddle prod to fight off a group of 4, while Superman keeps pushing the faces of the Trekkies into the cake>
Superman: Cakes taste's good!
Jedi Knight: Hey save some of that for me <as he continues to fight>
JBond: Coming right up! <puts a piece of cake on the prod and launches it to Jedi Knight>
Jedi Knight: Thanks! <eats it as he cuts the belt of a very large Trekkie who loses his pants>
Superman: <continues to stuff the Trekkies face in cake> Next time you should bring some Kryptonite if you want to take me down!
All the sudden a rumble is heard and a shadow looms over our heroes in battle. Is it:
A). An alien spaceship again.
B). Marlon Brando
C). A revived Godzilla
D). Steven Segal currently in his lard incarnation.
HILARIOUS post!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-20-2000 08:19 PM
Suddenly the three heroes sight Roseanne running through the street, roaring like an animal.
Roseanne: I'm gooonna eat ya!
Agent Smith: Ooooookaaaayyyyyy! Well, I'm outta here!
Agent Smith jets off.
Also hilarious! (notice this is ALL in a week of posting!)
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Superman: posted 10-24-2000 05:47 PM
Trix Rabbit: <Pulls out a switch blade> I'll hurt you so bad you'll be screaming for your mother!
The image of this is just hilarious!
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JBond: 10-24-2000 08:12 PM
JBond: A Tornado you say! This looks like a job for...Bond!
(Bond starts to shoot at the tornado with his PPK)
Jedi: Uhhh, what are you doing?
JBond: Shh! Not now! *Bang* *Bang*
Superman: Whatever. I got a better idea!
A. Superman destroys the Weather Center so a tornado could not possibly continue
B. Superman runs like a little school girl
C. Superman calls Helen Hunt and Bill Paxton over
D. Superman throws Shatner into the tornado, hoping that's in ample sacrifice
This was my first post in a few days, I thought it was pretty funny!
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Superman: posted 10-24-2000 09:36 PM
Priest: Do you Venom take Jessica Alba to be your wife.
Venom: I do!!
Priest: Jessica Alba, do you take Venom as your husband.
Jessica Alba: I do!
Priest: I now pronounce you husband and wife!
Superman: Yo Venom snap out of it! <Snaps fingers in front of him>
Venom: Huh?
Superman: Dude I know this traumatic but snap out of it.
RossBond: Hey how come you grabbed Jedi and wanted him as your wife?
Jedi: <Stands in the corner of the room afraid to go near Venom>
Venom: Sorry I must've zoned out...
This was freaking hilarious!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-25-2000 07:41 PM Shatner: Qui Gon never told you about your father.
Jedi: He told me enough. He told me he had a seizure while watching one of your movies!
Shatner: No, Jedi...I am your father.
Jedi falls to his knees.
Jedi: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Where it was said Shatner was Jedi’s father (one of them). Also from a hilarious post!
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JBond: posted 10-25-2000 10:18 PM
C. Jerry Springer doing a show with class
Springer: Yes, I know, let it all out.
Guest: i'm sooo saaaaaad!!
JBond: I've always been disgusted by Jerry Springer, but somehow this is just wrong! I can't STAND IT! Jedi: Have no fear! I'll save it!
(Jedi picks up a chair) Jedi: Stop ******* sniffling you ****** ****, I ******* hate it when ****** ******* cry!!!! Jedi then slams the chair into the guest.
Crowd: Jedi! Jedi! Jedi!
Superman: Let's make it interesting!
(Superman passes guns to half of the people in the crowd)
Superman: That's more like it!
I thought this was funny!
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Superman: posted 10-25-2000 11:14 PM
Jerry: Now Mr. Bond, how do you think the public will view you now. Why did you do this?
JBond: Well Jer, can I call you Jer?
Jerry: Sure you can son.
JBond: Don't call me son.
This was really funny!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-25-2000 11:40 PM
Shatner pulls out a sword and starts showing off some kung fu moves.
Shatner swings the sword and slices the air.
Jedi: (yawning) Your boring me.
Shatner charges at Jedi with the sword.
Shatner: (as he charges) KHANNNNN!!!
Jedi steps out of the way and Shatner slams headfirst into the brick wall behind him.
That was really funny!
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Superman: posted 10-26-2000 04:51 PM
Jedi Knight: Okay so I exaggerated! <All the heroes look at him and step back as the father's approach Jedi Knight> Oh crap! <Jedi looks around and finally has an idea> Hey Mr. Portman, Mr. Geller, and Mr. Moore look a birdie!
The three fathers: Oh where!! <They all look around while the heroes run away including a shirtless JBond>
Superman: So much for the "Jedi mind trick."
Jedi Knight: Worked on you...
Superman: I thought we weren't going to discuss that incident...
Hilarious!
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Superman: posted 10-27-2000 05:25 PM
Venom: I was too drunk to notice.
JBond: I saw it, but then again I see a lot of strange things.
Superman: Yeah like a woman with her clothes on.
JBond: Shut up jackass...
Superman: What did you just call me!
JBond: Nothin!
I love the arguments you make between the members!
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Superman: 10-28-2000 05:35 PM
Anna: Venom, I have something to tell you...
Venom: Yeah yeah yeah, your my sister.
Anna: How did you know!?
Venom: Because Jedi Knight was playing sharades and acting the whole thing out while I was fighting Wolverine.
Anna: Oh…
Bizarre, but that’s what made this really funny!
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Superman: 10-29-2000 01:59 PM
Regis: <Approaches the hero as he's seen wearing a robe> I have a millionn dollar question for you first.
Jedi Knight: What is it?
Regis: Have you ever seen anything like this! <Takes off his robe to reveal he's nude>
Jedi Knight: AHHH ***** I'm blind! <Falls>
Venom: Mother of... <collapses> What... kind of monster... are you...
Regis: The sexiest fat slob!
Jedi Knight: Noooo!!!
Also very funny!
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Superman: posted 10-29-2000 04:10 PM Mickey Mouse: Get the *hic* f--k off of me, your crushing my pecker!
..........ok!
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Superman: posted 10-29-2000 04:10 PM
RossBond: What I don't get it?
Venom: Put 2 + 2 together and you'll get it!
RossBond: 4
Venom: What?
RossBond: 2 + 2 is 4.
Superman: No!
RossBond: It's not 4, I always got 4 when I added 2 + 2.
Superman: No its still 4!
RossBond: Then how come you said it wasn't?
Superman: It is but that's not what he meant.
RossBond: What way is there to mean it, 2 + 2 has always been 4.
Superman: NO!!!
RossBond: You just said it was!
Superman: 5...4...3...2...1... <Runs up to smack Ross when the others pull him off>
Venom: <Pulls Ross over to explain it to him>
JBond: <Shakes his head> We'll never last as an organized team...
Great skit!
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Jedi Knight: posted 10-31-2000 10:20 PM
JBond: Okay poeple, we need to get back to the Bar!
All of the heroes rush to a sidewalk to get a cab.
Jedi: Superman, you can fly, remember?
Superman: Oh...yeah <flies off>
Jedi: <shakes his head>
RossBond: TAXI!
Ha ha! That’s great!
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JBond: posted 10-31-2000 10:46 PM
B. Jedi uses a mind trick to make the Shatners think they are chickens
Jedi Knight: posted 11-01-2000 03:16 PM
Shatner: Yummy! Chickens!
Shatner runs after the heroes, trying to eat them.
JBond: posted 11-01-2000 03:37 PM
Jedi...I meant the Shatners think themselves are chickens!!
This was a hilarious mix-up!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-01-2000 10:44 PM
Keanu: Qui Goon never told you about your brother....!
Jedi: Oh please no...!
Keanu: ...I AM YOUR BROTHER!
Jedi: NOOOOOO!!!!!!
THIS! I did not catch... I’m going to have to mention this later......YEAH!!
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Superman: posted 11-02-2000 07:17 PM
RossBond: <Looking out the window> Well um it looks like the Teletubbies are riding on a big cheese wheel in the city, and the Shatner clones are having a breakdancing contest.
Superman: NOOOOOO!!!!
JBond: What!? What!?
Superman: I wanted to be in the breakdancing contest this year. I even sharpened up my moves...
Jedi Knight: <Shakes his head> You know... Forget it, its not even worth commenting on.
Weird...but hilarious!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-04-2000 01:22 PM
ITS THE "STAY PUFF" MARSHMALLOW MAN!
Superman: Whoa!
RossBond: Run, everybody!
The heroes run into an empty Hotel lobby and head to the Elevator.
Venom: We need to get to the roof!
JBond: Uh....why?
Superman: Yeah, why do we need to get to the roof? Were perfectly safe here.
Venom: Uh...we just have to!
Jedi: I'm surrounded by idiots.
Suddenly the Marshmallow man punches his hand through the Hotel door and grabs RossBond!
RossBond: AAAAAHHHH!!!
Venom: We've got to save him!
JBond: Why?
Venom: YOU ASK TOO MANY QUESTIONS!
2 funny things!
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Superman: posted 11-04-2000 02:14 PM
Superman: Hey wait I got an idea! RossBond you up for a snack?
RossBond: Yeah I suppose...
Superman: <Huddles everyone together for the plan>
A few seconds later RossBond runs up to the Marshmallow Man and starts eating his legs which causes him to collapse.
Jedi Knight: That.... That's just plain weird...
JBond: Which is why I have my video camera handy <Films everything>
Bizarre=Funny!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-04-2000 02:37 PM
Then, Roseanne bursts through the door and eats Venom!
JBond: Crap!
JBond runs up the stairs; trying to hide from Roseanne.
Roseanne: I want cooookkkkiiiiiieeeeess!
I just had to put this in here, it’s funny!!
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Superman: posted 11-04-2000 03:37 PM
Superman: Hey if you ever want to remove it I can do it with my heat vision for $50. Here's my card. <Hands RossBond the card>
RossBond: This isn't even a real card! It has a sloppy drawing of your "S" symbol written on the back of a napkin! And the phone number is for Domino's Pizza.
Superman: Can't blame me for trying.
JBond: The problem is you don't try...
Superman: I heard that "Mr. I want my blanky."
JBond: Shhhhh!! There are females present!
Venom: Not that Jedi would know what to do with one...
Jedi Knight: Hey that whole Portman/Moore/Geller incident was settled!
Superman: Yeah by an out of court settlement.
Jedi Knight: Yeah, 30 days of community service shoveling ***** at the farm.
That’s just hilarious!
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Superman: posted 11-04-2000 04:53 PM
Katie Holmes: We're looking for Bond.
RossBond: <Gets up> That would be me!
Rachel Leigh Cook: No, other Bond.
JBond: That would be me <In suave tone>
Jennifer Lopez: Well I'm glad I finally found you... <Slaps him in the face> Quit sending naked pictures of yourself to us or I'll get Puffy after you!
Rachel Leigh Cook: You'll be hearing from out lawyers!
Katie Holmes: My innocence has been shattered...
The three girls leave and everyone looks at Bond.
JBond: <Gives everyone the finger> Show's over!
Superman: It's not even 9am and we have our first lawsuit of the day.
Jedi Knight: Speaking of which we have to review our lawsuits for budgetery reasons. We need to know how much money we have to set aside for this. Okay I was sued by three girls, one is a minor.
Venom: Again...
Jedi Knight: Superman, your being sued for flying while intoxicated and indecent exposure while flying...
Superman: <High fives JBond>
JBond: Nice work!!
Jedi Knight: RossBond is being sued by the city for covering it in cheese, and assualting a cab driver with his shoe...
RossBond: So sue me!
Venom: That's exactly what they're doing.
RossBond: Oh...
Jedi Knight: JBond is being sued by those three girls for harassment...
Superman: Naturally.
Jedi Knight: The only one not being sued is Venom.
JBond: Mama's boy!
Venom: <Lifts JBond over his head and tosses him out the bar window> Put me down for assualt and battery and damage to private property.
Jedi Knight: <Takes notes>
I don’t think I saw this last time, it’s hilarious! Against James Bond, but hilarious!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-04-2000 05:25 PM
Jedi takes a seat next to Cook and lays on the pick up lines.
Then Barney enters the room and starts gobbling up all the club's inhabitants!
JBond: This kind of stuff just seems to happen to us, does'nt it?
Superman: I guess so.
Not the first, but one of many posts making fun of the MANY situations the heroes go through!
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Superman: posted 11-04-2000 06:55 PM
Venom: Well we still have a major situation. Baby Bopp, the Teletubbies, Segal, Schumacher, Pikachu...
RossBond: Bless you.
:)
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Superman: posted 11-09-2000 06:17 PM
Superman: <Gets up> Where did the girls come from?
JBond: Some former girls I slept with.
Superman: All 200 of them!?
JBond: Well the other 5,000 couldn't make it.
Superman: Figures.
JBond: So how do we break up Ross and Jedi?
Superman: <Whistles> Ross! Chow time!
RossBond: <Gets up and runs to the table with knife and fork>
Jedi Knight: <Tries to seduce the women that Bond brought but they slap him with a lawsuit>
I thought this was pretty funny!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-10-2000 01:13 PM
Jedi: <pulls out a blaster and blows Kurt Angle, Shatner, and the rest of the city away>
Probably the simplest solution anyone has posted!
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JBond: posted 11-14-2000 06:02 PM
Eastwood: I asked you question, did I give you six dollars, or did I give you five? Maybe i kept a dollar in my wallet. Well? Do you feel lucky, PUNK!
Store Clerk: Uh, Sir. You gave me a fake credit card.
Eastwood: Oh....Gotta go! <Eastwood huffs and puffs while trying to run away>
I thought this was funny! It was also a post that revived the thread from being forgotten!
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Jedi Knight: posted 11-18-2000 06:39 PM
Suddenly the heroes spot Chuck Heston blowing away monkeys in the streets with a "borrowed" N.R.A. Tank!
Heston: Take that you blasted dirty apes! <laughs maniacally>
Venom: NNNNOOOO!!!!
Superman: Calm down, man! Are the monkeys friends of yours or something?
Venom: No. This just seemed like the appropriate time to say, 'NNNNNOOOO!!!!'
That’s hilarious!
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Venom2010: posted 12-05-2000 12:09 PM
Venom2010 kills everyone with a machine gun
It sounded like a good idea at the time!
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Jbond: posted 12-08-2000 10:15 AM
Superman: Now. Where are we going again?
JBond: I don't really know! Hold on, let me check page 10.
Superman: Page 10? What are you talking about?
JBond: Oh I found it! We are going to New York to defeat the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man!
Jedi: No,no,no! That's page 6, JBond!
Jbond: Uh, Jedi. I beleive I know what page I'm on!
Jedi: Oh that's right! JBond knows everythiing!!
Jedi: IT'S PAGE 6!!!!
JBond: IT'S PAGE 10!!!!
Jedi: 6
JBond: 10
Jedi: 6!
JBond: 10!
Jedi: 6!!
JBond: 10!!
Jedi: 10!
JBond: 6!
Jedi: Ha HA!
This was my satire of how long and confusing it was all getting, I thought it was pretty funny!
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Superman: posted 12-09-2000 01:30 PM
RossBond: Oh *****... I'm car sick... <Sticks his head out the window and pukes. The vomit hits the Predator ship blocking its view and also the vomit hits the streets making the roads slick. The ship crashes into Wendy's>
Superman: Talk about your drive thrus.
That was a good joke!
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Jedi Knight: posted 12-09-2000 06:58 PM
Suddenly, the heroes spot a figure walking towards them from the wreckage of the Wendy's Restaraunt.
Ross: Hey look! Someone's coming from the smoke...wait a second...ITS DAVE THOMAS!
Dave Thomas walks over to the heroes and mumbles some incoherent drivvle, then dies.
Jedi: What did he just say?
Superman: <Wiping a tear from his eye> I think he said to order the spicy chicken sandwich.
I thought this has just HILARIOUS!!!
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Jedi Knight: posted 12-09-2000 08:02 PM
JBond: Yes! We will ALL eat the spicy chicken sandwich! In honor of...of..
Jedi: Dave Thomas
JBond: Yes! Dave Thomas!
Jedi: I'm in
RossBond: I'm in
Superman: Spicy food gives me ulcers
JBond: Then get some fries
Superman: I'm not really hungry
JBond: Then get a coke!
Superman: My doctor says I should cut down on sugar
JBond: Then blow straw wrappers at people in the resturant!
Superman: Ok! Let's go!
<The heroes look at the resturant>
RossBond: Oh yeah...It was destroyed
...
JBond: On to McDonalds!!
Heroes: Yeah!!!
I thought this was a funny follow-up!
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Superman: posted 12-11-2000 11:13 PM
RossBond: Where did you hide Alf's carcass?
Jedi Knight: In JBond's brief case.
JBond: <Spits out his drink> You reject! There were important documents for my mission in there!!
Superman: Yeah screw numerous women, listen to the villain explain what he's gonna do and that gives you time to kill him. Your tellin me you weren't expecting that to happen.
Once again, Superman making fun of James Bond…but it was still funny!
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JBond: posted 12-14-2000 11:21 AM
You guys HAVE to look at this!!!
WE WON!!!
http://entertainment.msn.com/news/eonline/1214/priceline.asp
This was my post of a link that led to a page that said William Shatner was no longer going to work at priceline.com, it was the end of the Shatner Era! :)
After that, it took us almost a week to come up with Bill Gates being in the story.
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JBond: posted 12-19-2000 02:17 PM
Welcome to the Bill Gates secret factory!!
FLOOR 1: Lobby version 3.11
FLOOR 2: Urkel's labortory of glass, models, and breakable things(closed for repairs)
FLOOR 3: Microsoft: 'Word up!' facility
FLOOR 4: Gates' secret floor (*don't tell anyone*)
This was a sign in a post I made that I thought was funny!
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Jedi Knight: posted 12-20-2000 05:45 PM
· Elmo: <At the Bar counter> Give me another "Bloody Mary," Bob!
· Bar-Tender: Sorry, Elmo. You're going to have to leave now.
· Elmo: But...but...
· Bar-Tender: Man, I think you've had too much to drink. You should leave.
· Elmo: Back up, Bob! <Punches the Bar-Tender back into the wall and runs off>
The image this gives is funny!