Conversation Stoppers II

[KurdtKobain84]

oh...uh, wait a minute, i think i just sh** my pants again.

[KurdtKobain84]

so... i heard your mom is a really nice guy.

[Dogbert0228]

I shot and killed a squirrel the other day with a BB gun.

[KurdtKobain84]

i burned my penis on the curling iron.

[KurdtKobain84]

me: do you look at the toilet paper after you wipe?

you: NO!

me: well, how else do you know when you're done wiping?!

[JimmyDean]

You see this?

*Points to my croutch area*

That's where babies come from!

[PsychoMike]

Pretty much anything I say stops a conversation. That is assuming some actually listens to me.

[DalOwnerx3]

wow 31 pages. not sure if was mentioned, but basically anything that Ralph Wiggums (The Simpsons) say..
"My cat's breath smells like cat food"
"The doctor said that I wouldn't have so many nosebleeds if I kept my finger out of there!"
"I sleep in a drawer!"

[CapricornDevil]

"So, last night as I was being beaten by a girl scout...."

[DalOwnerx3]

"hi! i'm running for Governor of California"

[CapricornDevil]

A gay man and a girl scout walk in to a pool hall

[CapricornDevil]

Is that Ohio in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

[CapricornDevil]

"It burns when I pee."

[todd philip]

" I EAT DEAD PEOPLE"

[sphericthor]

Originally posted by PsychoMike
Pretty much anything I say stops a conversation. That is assuming some actually listens to me.

This is a bit off topic, but I loved when this stopped the entire thread for weeks and I was hoping that it wouldn't start again because of what was said

[trevaine]

Fantasizing about 80 year old women mud-wrestling topless while sipping jello shooters through a straw is pretty normal, right? I mean.. who hasn't done that... right?

[PsychoMike]

Originally posted by sphericthor
This is a bit off topic, but I loved when this stopped the entire thread for weeks and I was hoping that it wouldn't start again because of what was said

I know I kept looking for this thread and was sort of disappointed when I saw new posts in it. I'm pretty sure I've ended a few threads, I was just hoping tis would be one of them.

[sphericthor]

Originally posted by PsychoMike
I know I kept looking for this thread and was sort of disappointed when I saw new posts in it. I'm pretty sure I've ended a few threads, I was just hoping tis would be one of them.

That would've been one hell of an achievement, maybe next time

[PsychoMike]

I still think I can get the last post in this thread. Here's hoping it works this time.

[dr_evil]

(someone probally did this already)


"I am from idaho";)

[cg124]

Hi i'm IdahoMR2man

[JBond]

"I don't remember eating that"

[Skinny]

"I don't remember drinking that either"

[Iben]

"maybe YOU wouldn't put that in your mouth, but I've done it many times before"

[IdahoMR2man]

Originally posted by cg124
Hi i'm IdahoMR2man

Played.

[todd philip]

"MMM... you HAVE got to try this! MMM it's delicous! its the best rat crap i have ever licked off a dead corpse!"

[cg124]

Originally posted by IdahoMR2man
Played. :p :D

[Superchunk]

Whoa I just checking out this thread. Havent been on here for awhile...saw one of my replies, 2nd page at the bottem. Kinda tripped me out. I remember when this site only had a thousand people.

[CapricornDevil]

"Then she said, that's not a sausage"

[Kris Hodgson]

"You know, if there is one guy in the world that I model my life after, it's that Hitler guy."

[JAE]

"You know that purfume kind of reminds me of my hemmroid cream."

[CapricornDevil]

"13 inches and I still can't get a date."

[sonjablue]

All I am saying is golf ball and fifty feet of hose.

[CapricornDevil]

make it 75 feet and you got yourself a deal.

[sonjablue]

You would not go back to stray dogs.

[CapricornDevil]

Depends on the stray dog

[sonjablue]

woof, woof, grrrr

[dr_evil]

"i have written pop songs, i have been a television producer.............and in addition i have murdered 33 human beings"

[sonjablue]

Oh, I thought that was your pinky.

[JAE]

I happen to like women with hairy nipples.

[CapricornDevil]

"So what if I don't have a penis? Isn't my personality enough?"

[JAE]

Yeah, toilet water doesn't taste that bad.

[CapricornDevil]

"So, after I licked the cat's butt, I ...... "

[Skinny]

yea... no need to stay up for me tonite... im gonna go and get myself a lapdance...

[todd philip]

yum, jbond meat is so delicous!

[JAE]

Farting is kind of a hobby for me.

[IdahoMR2man]

Hi. I'm American.

[cg124]

and thats how i found out i was a boy

[KurdtKobain84]

my nipples are the size of bologna slices.

[Skinny]

i have no nipples...

[cg124]

I have more nipples than fingers

[necronon99]

i want to frame your eye balls when you die baby

[todd philip]

I collect smegma

[EvilDeadNDN]

"... and so yeah, thats how herpes became a household name in these pants... er.. parts."

[cg124]

i'm not anarchy I just like there pretty signs

[HeadHunter]

who's for a bit od freindly spooning ??

[todd philip]

I'm Osama

[WDTSF]

...And so then, I just let one rip

[glsspder]

YOU MISSES YOUR PERIOD?

[WDTSF]

That's not a roll of quarters, baby

actually that's more of a bad pickup line than a convo stopper lol

[Necross]

sorry I gotta to use the ladies room....I mean the mens' room, whoops.

[todd philip]

god my uncle is hot

[Necross]

god my cat is hot

[fineus fog]

and then.. it just fell out of his ass...

[HeadHunter]

Arrrrgh matey, send the name HeadHunter to davy jones's locker! You will commandeer your ship as:
The Dread Pirate Ivan

[simmy]

i like feet


(id have run out the room screaming if anyone said that to me...urgh, feet)

[dr_evil]

"I can see your nose hair!"

[HeadHunter]

can i play with your nase hair

[redman]

u remind me of my mother.........

(i saw that one on sex and the city.........so funny)

[todd philip]

Originally posted by simmy
i like feet


(id have run out the room screaming if anyone said that to me...urgh, feet) I really do like feet!

[Necross]

Do you smell fish?

[todd philip]

Originally posted by Necross
Do you smell fish? ya, sorry, its my underwear.

[Necross]

Originally posted by todd philip
ya, sorry, its my underwear.

*shudders*

Well time to supress another memory....

[WDTSF]

I have 11 toes....on one foot!

[EvilDeadNDN]

"so tell me.. have you ever seen a grown man naked??"

[HeadHunter]

Spidy you insensitive Prick


thanks for the insiration evil :)

[WDTSF]

Originally posted by EvilDeadNDN
"so tell me.. have you ever seen a grown man naked??"
"How about an undeveloped grown man?"

[EvilDeadNDN]

no prob HH. lol

(to a chick) "Cripes, my balls are sensitive. ever since that woodchipper accident when I was drunk.. you hungry?"

[spiderman_2k]

Originally posted by HeadHunter
Spidy you insensitive Prick

Mother ****er...:mad:...:p

[EvilDeadNDN]

"hey its ok spidey, wanna get laid?" *growls*

[HeadHunter]

0_0

[EvilDeadNDN]

*nudge* that was a conversation stopper. *whispers* it worked.

[Drogobaggins]

"And that's why I will never touch myself again."

[WDTSF]

My cat's name is Frisky, and BOY is he frisky;)

[Kitty]

Originally posted by EvilDeadNDN
"so tell me.. have you ever seen a grown man naked??"
"Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?"
:hehe: i love that movie

[krullglaive]

i can definitely live without THAT.......

[HeadHunter]

Hello

[todd philip]

Originally posted by Kitty
"Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?"
:hehe: i love that movie Shirley you must be joking!

I'm not, and dont call me shirley!

[HeadHunter]

Dont worry the cream cleaned it up

[sphericthor]

Just thought of this........... bit crap but anyway here it is:

Bye :p

[HeadHunter]

i just have to walk in to the room :p

[Crispyfootcheez]

Pardon me, but do you have any grey poop?

[JimmyDean]

You're feet... they ARE just beautiful!

[Rogue]

Hi, my name's Jimmy. Can I see your feet? PLEEEEASE?! ;)

[Necross]

You mean you actually bathe? Thats soooooo last year.

[todd philip]

No thats not a banna, and no i am not happy to see you, thats just my pet gerbil larry.

[HeadHunter]

I JUST FARTED EVACURATE THE ROOM

[sphericthor]

The garbageman comes on Friday

[HeadHunter]

when was the sex change??

[Frizzo the Clown]

"....I never noticed it before that morning, but my Mom looks really sexy when she cleans the house...."

[dr_evil]

Hi my name Buck, and i came her to f***.

[Frizzo the Clown]

"..and then I said to my roommate, 'Hey man, I'm not into those backdoor shenanigans...at least not without the proper payment'...."

[HeadHunter]

Any of the Pick up lines in the "Pick Up Lines" thread :p

[glsspder]

Did you know that the word 'motel' spelled backwards means 'letom'?

[sonjablue]

One time, while driving my car........

[Frizzo the Clown]

"....and then he said I looked like his sister, and he asked me out...."

[glsspder]

Then she called my brother Dad.

[todd philip]

you knkow, osama bin laden is a pretty cool guy.

[Crispyfootcheez]

my panties are my uncles

[pixiness]

I miss this thread - but I'd miss it more if it were gone completely :)

[HeadHunter]

it was posted in 2 months ago....it wasnt going anywhere :p

[pixiness]

yeah - I noticed that a little AFTER reviving it.

My bad... someone should spank me and teach me a lesson

[HeadHunter]

Originally posted by pixiness
yeah - I noticed that a little AFTER reviving it.

My bad... someone should spank me and teach me a lesson

when ever you are ready :D

[glsspder]

Anyone for a cockapoo

[Colorado Cajun]

wow you remind me of HH

[HeadHunter]

whats that supposed to mean.....

[Colorado Cajun]

it's my conversation stopper :p

[HeadHunter]

oh :o

[EvilDeadNDN]

man, how was I supposed to know she was only 3?

[secant]

You know what would look good on you? Some body glitter.
*pulls out body glitter, begins spreading it liberally on bystanders*

actually, there was a guy that did that on Blind Date. 3 times. 3 different girls.

[erly_star]

"My mommy says...."

[thebtskink]

I'm a professional poker player. Do you happen to own a toilet? Cause I'm jacked full of deuces and I gotta flush.

[JBond]

Michael Jackson has taught me everything he knows.

[thebtskink]

"Persuant to Megan's Law, I am obligated to tell you that I am a registered sex offender."

[Knerys]

do you know what a eunich is?

[thebtskink]

"So then I said, 'I will only do it if you wear this paper bag on your head. With the lights off.' Of course, she had to say yes"

[JBond]

"Is it still considered sex if I had to drug her?"

[thebtskink]

"God that was painful. I'd rather masturbate with sandpaper. And believe me, I have."

[sshuttari]

"So basically I ended peeing my pants in front of the whole class"

[Frizzo the Clown]

...and then she rolled over and said, "I don't care if you're my son, you still have to pay me for the full hour."

[X-boro]

While cutting up the bodies makes them easier to move, it's not worth the mess.

[chillinvillin]

"Did you just say you'll suck off every guy in this room?"

[Nilade]

I don't really mind the burning, its the fact that its turning green that kinda stresses me out. So, can I get your number?

[petergriffin246]

"Do gay guys get turned on by their own weiners."

[masterful misha]

""sup homies **walk into a party with all blacks** (me being white), oops wrong party""

[The WupZter]

I heart Epic Movie.

[Ewok Droppings]

**walks into a bar holding a pile of dog crap**

'Hey Guys!! Look what I almost stepped in!"

[Where's my elephant?]

I heart Epic Movie.

I was about to post that. :angry: :P

"I'm really looking forward to that Graduate remake with Timberlake and Demi Moore!"

Search for it on yahoo/google news if you don't believe me.

[JBond]

"Does this taste like Ebola to you?"

[Where's my elephant?]

"Paris Hilton is much more attractive than Rachel McAdams."

"Forget about The Police's Grammys reunion and Rage Against The Machine's Coachella Festival reunion. They suck. I'd rather see N Sync and New Kids on the Block reunite."

[Inval1d]

"so i told grandma to stop licking so fast..."

[Deexan]

"Does anyone else find AIDS really funny?! Blue Peter was on tv the other day and this kid was came on whose parents had both died from AIDS in Africa and we just burst out laughing..."


The above actually happened.

[chillinvillin]

only mommy touches me there

[Where's my elephant?]

"I'm glad Fox cancelled Arrested Development to make room for The War At Home."

"Rosie O'Donnell is such a nice person."

[equipe]

Jack Bauer is a pussy.

[JBond]

"Yuck! This punch taste like man juice!"

[Where's my elephant?]

"Tom Cruise is a mentally healthy individual."
"Britney Spears makes music that will stand the test of time."

[huggingprincess]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3TqCnIAbac

[Inval1d]

"i like to rub Diablo's testicles"

[Frizzo the Clown]

"I can only have an orgasm when I'm punched in the testicles."

[smokiechimp]

"I shot a cat up the arsehole once...."

[ViRUs]

".....and actually your sitting in it now."

[Frizzo the Clown]

"...and then I shot my friend in the face with a shotgun..."

[Carnage Escobar]

"Wait, he wanted to beat my ass? Sorry, but I don't swing off of that side of the plate."

[thebtskink]

"See I'm only half gay. I do chicks on the side to straighten myself out. But my friend here......LOVES the dick"

[Where's my elephant?]

"I came up with the idea for New Coke in the 80s."

[JBond]

".....and actually your sitting in it now."

Far Side?

I first based this thread and the title on that comic strip.

[Where's my elephant?]

"I blindly let the MPAA decide what my kids do or don't see. If they say an R rated Planes, Trains, & Automobiles is more innaproriate for them than a PG13 rated Ring or Grudge then it is so. They are always trustworthy."

[JBond]

What?

[Steve from Indy]

Anything that begins with "My boyfriend".

[coach34]

Is that yellow snow

[Where's my elephant?]

St. Anger is way better than Master of Puppets and Ride the Lightning combined.

[ViRUs]

Far Side?

I first based this thread and the title on that comic strip.


lol, yeah thats it. I was wondering if anyone was going to catch that.

[smokiechimp]

"Ted Bundy. Now There's A Rolemodel"

[Where's my elephant?]

"Score another future Oscar nod for Eddie Murphy in Norbit!"

[chillinvillin]

"did you see the size of her adams apple?"

[Where's my elephant?]

"Courtney Love killed Kurt Cobain. He didn't commit suicide."

[JBond]

Depends who you say that too. Like if you said that to this guy I used to work with, you might become good friends...

[Knerys]

You want some cocaine?

[JBond]

"...and then I used this cocaine this woman sold me and fed it to my cat"

[thebtskink]

"I was walking home one day, then I caught the eye of this really, really hyper cat, who started running circles around me, alternatively pawing at my shoes and begging me to scratch it head. I didn't know how to respond, so I just threw it into a wood chipper."

[JBond]

"I had never had better stew than what I found in that woodchipper on that beautiful August day, so long ago..."

[Ewok Droppings]

Anyone smell crap??? Ha, just kidding it's just me, my depends are full.

[Where's my elephant?]

"I'll be back, my wonderful wife. I have to go to the bathroom and masturbate for a few minutes."