Farting.. the big mystery in life

[D-fence]

My question is a simple one..

Why do you usually think your own farts smell quite delicious?

I mean.. if I’m sitting on the toilet after one of my grandma's famous pancakes, I don't think I smell all that bad! But if that same grandma lets one go in the kitchen.. well, I don't know how fast I have to get away from the disaster area!

Also.. lifting my blanket at night and taking a big sniff is one of my favourite hobbies after the light goes of. Am I alone in this? (don't lie, seek your hart, you know it to be true.) and what is it that makes us like our own scent that much?

Humans.. a strange race, aren't we? :p

[Warpedchick]

Oh please this is more information than I need to know!!! :eek: :p ;)

[Malice]

D-Fence, no offence, I feel dumber for having read this....

[Blank Slate]

Originally posted by mrTECH:
<STRONG>D-Fence, no offence, I feel dumber for having read this....</STRONG>

I second that feeling.

[JBond]

Originally posted by Blank Slate:
<STRONG>

I second that feeling.</STRONG>

I third that fealing...im mean feling....AHHHHH, it's too late!!!!!

[Frizzo the Clown]

D-fence, you are one smart feller!

[D-fence]

Originally posted by Frizzo the Clown:
<STRONG>D-fence, you are one smart feller!</STRONG>


:D and besides that.. I'M HONEST!!

[cafeman]

Originally posted by D-fence:
<STRONG> :D and besides that.. I'M HONEST!!</STRONG>

and besides that you`re a sicko :D

[Godzilla]

Originally posted by JBond:
<STRONG>

I third that fealing...im mean feling....AHHHHH, it's too late!!!!!</STRONG>

I forth it.

[D-fence]

Originally posted by Godzilla:
<STRONG>

I forth it.</STRONG>

aw what the hell.. i fifth AND sixth that!!

[Loaded Weapon]

this is a strang topic. I hate the silent
but deadly farts those are the worst.

[D-fence]

It’s funny.. but until now nobody has giving a scientific explanation to my dilemma! :)

[Warpedchick]

Your a Fartologist! :eek: :p :D

[Frizzo the Clown]

Originally posted by D-fence:
<STRONG>It’s funny.. but until now nobody has giving a scientific explanation to my dilemma! :)</STRONG>
Midgets. They're the reason for all unexplained phenomenon in the Universe. Believe me, I know!

[Superman]

I found that initial post highly disturbing yet true, come on guys you know he ain't lying.

[D-fence]

Originally posted by Superman:
<STRONG>I found that initial post highly disturbing yet true, come on guys you know he ain't lying.</STRONG>

thank you. let the debate begin!! :p

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by D-fence:
<STRONG>My question is a simple one..

Why do you usually think your own farts smell quite delicious?

I mean.. if I’m sitting on the toilet after one of my grandma's famous pancakes, I don't think I smell all that bad! But if that same grandma lets one go in the kitchen.. well, I don't know how fast I have to get away from the disaster area!

Also.. lifting my blanket at night and taking a big sniff is one of my favourite hobbies after the light goes of. Am I alone in this? (don't lie! seek your hart, you know it to be true!!) and what is it that makes us like our own sent that much?

Humans.. a strange race, aren't we? :p</STRONG>


how true it is!
i like to sniff my fart, armpit, swet, and crotch!

[aeon-death]

oops!
i think i gave out too much info :p

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by D-fence:
<STRONG>My question is a simple one..

Why do you usually think your own farts smell quite delicious?

I mean.. if I’m sitting on the toilet after one of my grandma's famous pancakes, I don't think I smell all that bad! But if that same grandma lets one go in the kitchen.. well, I don't know how fast I have to get away from the disaster area!

Also.. lifting my blanket at night and taking a big sniff is one of my favourite hobbies after the light goes of. Am I alone in this? (don't lie! seek your hart, you know it to be true!!) and what is it that makes us like our own sent that much?

Humans.. a strange race, aren't we? :p</STRONG>


i wonder if girls do that too :rolleyes: :D

[ 09-20-2001: Message edited by: aeon-death ]

[thebtskink]

Originally posted by D-fence:
<STRONG>

aw what the hell.. i fifth AND sixth that!!</STRONG>


I ate it.. what... what are snickering at?...
;)

[Godzilla]

Originally posted by thebtskink:
<STRONG>


I ate it.. what... what are snickering at?...
;)</STRONG>

Hey! Skink's back! Where the hell have you been?

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by aeon-death:
<STRONG>


i wonder if girls do that too :rolleyes: :D

[ 09-20-2001: Message edited by: aeon-death ]</STRONG>

NO WE DO NOT!!!!! :mad:

Thankfully that is definitely a male thing and you can keep it! :p :D

[Frizzo the Clown]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

NO WE DO NOT!!!!! :mad:

Thankfully that is definitely a male thing and you can keep it! :p :D</STRONG>

Somehow I don't believe that.... ;)

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

NO WE DO NOT!!!!! :mad:
</STRONG>

i believe you :D

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>
Thankfully that is definitely a male thing</STRONG>

well, you don't know that for sure :rolleyes:
maybe most people(including girls) do that :D and you'r one of the few who don't ;)

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>
and you can keep it! :p :D</STRONG>

nope! i don't wanna keep it.
i said i like to sniff doesn't mean i do it all the time, and it doesn't realy mean i enjoy doing it. :D

....ok, :rolleyes: maybe alittle bit

[D-fence]

You know.. with all of us sharing this, getting it in the open.. i feel this group is coming much closer together. i feel.. a bond. Maybe we should start a club or something! now for a name... :confused:

suggestion: "C.S.A.A." (the Coming Soon Anal Anonymous)

Just a thought.. :p

[thebtskink]

Originally posted by Godzilla:
<STRONG>

Hey! Skink's back! Where the hell have you been?</STRONG>

In my hole, doing a three month's worth of summer work in about a week and a half.

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Frizzo the Clown:
<STRONG>

Somehow I don't believe that.... ;)</STRONG>

HEY! :mad: :mad:

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by aeon-death:
<STRONG>

well, you don't know that for sure :rolleyes:
maybe most people(including girls) do that :D and you'r one of the few who don't ;)</STRONG>

Hey out of all the conversations I have had with other females over the years (and we have talked about many things) liking the smell of one's own fart IS NOT ONE OF THEM!!!! :mad: :mad:

I admit there maybe a closet female fart smeller out there but I have never met her and I'm not sure I would want to!! :p ;)

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by aeon-death:
<STRONG>

nope! i don't wanna keep it.
i said i like to sniff doesn't mean i do it all the time, and it doesn't realy mean i enjoy doing it. :D

....ok, :rolleyes: maybe alittle bit</STRONG>

You are one sick smelly little puppy!!! :p :D ;)

[Kyle Katarn]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>
NO WE DO NOT!!!!! :mad:
</STRONG>

I beleive you! And I have proof! When I clean the bathrooms at work, I notice that the air freshener is always in the ladies' room! :D

...and the plunger is always in there too...but I guess that's a discussion for another day... ;) :D

[Stark]

That's a good point, Kyle.
And what's more...why do girls toilets always look like five-star hotels when guys cans look like, well...s h i t houses?
The girls changerooms where I work are plush-city. They're clean, well tiled, fresh smelling while the guys just plain stink, the showers are relics from the stone-age and the crappers themselves are a disgrace at the best of times.
Is it because we don't want to believe girls don't cut the cheese like guys do and we want to eliminate all the evidence?
And come on Grotesqueangel...I know heaps of girls who check the wind when they let one go...Aussie chicks...gotta love 'em! :) :D :) :D :) :D

[Kyle Katarn]

Stark, my high school was a prime example of what you are saying...the men's showers were like 2 large pipes in an open room, with shower heads coming out on all sides - while the girls got stalls. And the bathrooms...hooboy! In the main commons, the men's room had DOORLESS STALLS :eek:! And the vocational area also had doorless stalls, with partitions only about 3 and 1/2 feet high! There were 2 bathrooms that had doors on the stalls, but no locks and short ( 4 or 4 1/2 feet) partitions - but I think that applied to the girl's room as well...What I'm getting at is that while we may TALK more about bodily functions, we don't all like to PUT ON A SHOW while doing them!

BTW, I once suggested putting a smoke detector with a sprinkler system in the girls room...the main doors were always kept open, and the smoke coming out of there put a fog in the whole hall! The Vice Principal (who was always after smokers) said that he didn't think those in white T-shirts would appreciate that idea very much, though... :D :eek:

[Godzilla]

Originally posted by Stark:
<STRONG>Aussie chicks...gotta love 'em! :) :D :) :D :) :D</STRONG>

You got that right. I love Grotesqeangel. She just doesn't know it. What? Damnit!

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Kyle Katarn:
<STRONG>

...and the plunger is always in there too...but I guess that's a discussion for another day... ;) :D</STRONG>

Hey there are some things we girls would like to keep secret thank you!!! :mad: :p ;)

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Stark:
<STRONG>That's a good point, Kyle.
And what's more...why do girls toilets always look like five-star hotels when guys cans look like, well...s h i t houses?
The girls changerooms where I work are plush-city. They're clean, well tiled, fresh smelling while the guys just plain stink, the showers are relics from the stone-age and the crappers themselves are a disgrace at the best of times.
Is it because we don't want to believe girls don't cut the cheese like guys do and we want to eliminate all the evidence?
And come on Grotesqueangel...I know heaps of girls who check the wind when they let one go...Aussie chicks...gotta love 'em! </STRONG>

Unlike men who like to check each other out when they go to the toilet, by that I mean who is bigger than who! ;) Females like to keep what they do in a toilet private hence toilet's with doors that lock. Afterwards they like to stand around in a nice environment and gossip. Or put other females down if they are at a nightclub. Besides females spend more time in a toilet than men do, you guys should know that! :p :D

And I still haven't met another female who smells their own farts and likes it! :mad: Aussie males gotta slap them to keep them in line! :rolleyes: :p ;) :D

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Godzilla:
<STRONG>

You got that right. I love Grotesqeangel. She just doesn't know it. What? Damnit!</STRONG>

I do now scaly butt!! ;) :D

[Godzilla]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

I do now scaly butt!! ;) :D</STRONG>

Like I said, Damnit!

[Kyle Katarn]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

Unlike men who like to check each other out when they go to the toilet, by that I mean who is bigger than who! ;) Females like to keep what they do in a toilet private hence toilet's with doors that lock. </STRONG>

Uh...I beg to differ on the both points...STRONGLY on the first one! :eek: I do not "check out" anyone in the bathroom, nor have I been "checked out" in the bathroom before! (And if guys want to keep their eyes from being forcefully removed, things will STAY that way :mad:!)And I know several females that are pretty open about their bathroom habits...

But I just guess it all depends on the personality, not the gender. Looking at my point of view, and seeing yours, could it be that both men and women think that the opposite sex is much more open about bathroom habits than their own???

"Katarn's Bathroom Hypothesis #5!" :D

[Superman]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

NO WE DO NOT!!!!! :mad:

Thankfully that is definitely a male thing and you can keep it! :p :D</STRONG>

Jessica Simpson admits she likes to rip one and is not afraid to admit it. I will never look at Jessica Simpson the same way again.

[Superman]

Man I can't tell you the number of times I have gone to a public restroom and someone has ***** all over the wall! The G*d damn walls people, what the hell are they doing in there!?!?

[JBond]

Originally posted by Superman:
<STRONG>

I will never look at Jessica Simpson the same way again.</STRONG>

And how often and at what time is that?

[tyler_durden]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

NO WE DO NOT!!!!! :mad:

Thankfully that is definitely a male thing and you can keep it! :p :D</STRONG>

She's just too embarrassed to admit the truth. When my wife and I are riding in the car and she rips one, I have to beg her to role down her window so that the stink will go away from me. But as soon as I let one go, she demands that I role down the window.

Damn women and their smelly farts.....

[tyler_durden]

I have never checked anybody out in the mens room. I usually try to find some privacy, I hate public restrooms....so dirty and open and scary.....

[D-fence]

Originally posted by tyler_durden:
<STRONG>I have never checked anybody out in the mens room. I usually try to find some privacy, I hate public restrooms....so dirty and open and scary.....</STRONG>

tell me about your childhood..

[Frizzo the Clown]

Originally posted by Superman:
<STRONG>

Jessica Simpson admits she likes to rip one and is not afraid to admit it. I will never look at Jessica Simpson the same way again.</STRONG>
I will never stand down-wind from Jessica Simpson again!

[Stark]

Aussie males gotta slap them to keep them in line! :rolleyes: :p ;) :D[/QB][/QUOTE]

PROMISE?!?!?!

:D ;) :p :D

[Stark]

At least you've answered one question for me, Grotesqueangel - what you girls do in the toilet at nightclubs. I always used to wonder why you went in twos and took up to half an hour for what is (usually, minus reading material) a relatively brief event.
I suspected it was "secret womens' business" - badmouthing males - and now I know.
But can you hurry it up? Have you ever had to wait for someone in the can on a Saturday night at the Star Bar (or worse the Mercury Lounge)? I waited for nearly 45 minutes one night!

[Stark]

...and while I'm here, why do Americans call the "facility" the bathroom? It's not like you go there for a wash or anything. I know you (are supposed to!) wash when you are finished, but that's not the main reason you go.
I can understand the term "restroom" - it can be quite relaxing at times (if you haven't been drinking the night before).
The John?
The Crapper?
The dunny?
The khazi?

Where do these nicknames for the "Bathroom", or "Toilet" (as we Aussies call it - which should be included in my list - where'd that onbe come from?) come from?

WHO...DOES...NUMBER...TWO...WORK...FOR...??? :p :p

[Kyle Katarn]

Originally posted by Superman:
<STRONG>

Jessica Simpson admits she likes to rip one and is not afraid to admit it. </STRONG>

Sounds like one of my female cousins from the east! Come on, most guys know at least one female who takes pleasure in cutting the cheese, or burping, or other such "manly" acts... :D

[tyler_durden]

Whew, I just woke up from sniffing the nasty one I just ripped.

*Note to self: Don't sniff your farts anymore*

(Tyler rips another big fart, sniffs, and passes out face first, again)

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Kyle Katarn:
<STRONG>

Uh...I beg to differ on the both points...STRONGLY on the first one! :eek: I do not "check out" anyone in the bathroom, nor have I been "checked out" in the bathroom before! (And if guys want to keep their eyes from being forcefully removed, things will STAY that way :mad:!)And I know several females that are pretty open about their bathroom habits...

But I just guess it all depends on the personality, not the gender. Looking at my point of view, and seeing yours, could it be that both men and women think that the opposite sex is much more open about bathroom habits than their own???

"Katarn's Bathroom Hypothesis #5!" :D</STRONG>

OK now I am wondering what type of women you are hanging around with!! :p ;) :D

And I believe you when you say you've never checked anyone out in a toilet! ;)

I still think men are more open about their bathroom habits hence urinals! But in the end it's the women who have the best bathrooms! :p

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Superman:
<STRONG>Man I can't tell you the number of times I have gone to a public restroom and someone has ***** all over the wall! The G*d damn walls people, what the hell are they doing in there!?!?</STRONG>

They are called spray painters!! ;) :D

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by tyler_durden:
<STRONG>

She's just too embarrassed to admit the truth. When my wife and I are riding in the car and she rips one, I have to beg her to role down her window so that the stink will go away from me. But as soon as I let one go, she demands that I role down the window.

Damn women and their smelly farts.....</STRONG>

HEY WOMEN DON'T HAVE SMELLY FARTS :mad: It must have been the dog! :p :D ;)

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Stark:
<STRONG>At least you've answered one question for me, Grotesqueangel - what you girls do in the toilet at nightclubs. I always used to wonder why you went in twos and took up to half an hour for what is (usually, minus reading material) a relatively brief event.
I suspected it was "secret womens' business" - badmouthing males - and now I know.
But can you hurry it up? Have you ever had to wait for someone in the can on a Saturday night at the Star Bar (or worse the Mercury Lounge)? I waited for nearly 45 minutes one night!</STRONG>

OK I admit we sometimes bad mouth guys as well! :o Usually about their pick up lines! :rolleyes:

I can beat 45 minutes, I was in the Ladies Room for over an hour talking to a woman from the outback about spiders under the toilet seat! :eek: :p ;)

And I'll slap you anytime anyplace! :p

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Kyle Katarn:
<STRONG>

Sounds like one of my female cousins from the east! Come on, most guys know at least one female who takes pleasure in cutting the cheese, or burping, or other such "manly" acts... :D</STRONG>

YEAH RIGHT! :mad: :mad:

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

Hey out of all the conversations I have had with other females over the years (and we have talked about many things) liking the smell of one's own fart IS NOT ONE OF THEM!!!! :mad: :mad:

I admit there maybe a closet female fart smeller out there but I have never met her and I'm not sure I would want to!! :p ;)</STRONG>

hey! :mad: i already said i believe you dont do that. :mad:

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

You are one sick smelly little puppy!!! :p :D ;)</STRONG>

what did i do? :confused: :p

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

Unlike men who like to check each other out when they go to the toilet, by that I mean who is bigger than who! ;)
</STRONG>
that's not true!!!! how did you get that idea you pervert!

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>
Females like to keep what they do in a toilet private hence toilet's with doors that lock.
</STRONG>
actually, so do men.

[ 09-24-2001: Message edited by: aeon-death ]

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>
Afterwards they like to stand around in a nice environment and gossip. Or put other females down if they are at a nightclub.</STRONG>
that's not true either! :mad: you're making a false generalizition about men :mad: i never put anyone down, and no, not all men go to night club, i never did!

[ 09-24-2001: Message edited by: aeon-death ]

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>
Besides females spend more time in a toilet than men do, you guys should know that! :p :D
</STRONG>
yes, i do.

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>
And I still haven't met another female who smells their own farts and likes it! :mad: line! :rolleyes: :p ;) :D</STRONG>
you haven't met one doesn't mean no female is like that. or maybe you've already met one you just don't know ;) :p

[ 09-24-2001: Message edited by: aeon-death ]

[Kyle Katarn]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

HEY WOMEN DON'T HAVE SMELLY FARTS :mad: It must have been the dog! :p :D ;)</STRONG>

Riiiiiight.... :rolleyes: :D

[Kyle Katarn]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

OK now I am wondering what type of women you are hanging around with!!

And I believe you when you say you've never checked anyone out in a toilet! ;)

I still think men are more open about their bathroom habits hence urinals! But in the end it's the women who have the best bathrooms! :p</STRONG>

Hmm, 3 points...

1. :D

2. HEY! :mad: ;)

3. I don't mind using them, I guess it's what we get used to. So if men are more open about bathroom habits, it's because the sexist designers gave women more privacy options in showers and bathrooms!! ;) But most guys are in and out, bam, chop chop - FAST in other words! Too fast to pay attention to anyones "hardware," urinals or not. And most of the better ones have dividers for privacy as well.

Though there is one thing some guys do...(but NOT ME! Scout's honor!)...leave without washing their hands! :eek: Is this a guy thing, or do the ladies sometimes skip that step too?

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Kyle Katarn:
<STRONG>

Though there is one thing some guys do...(but NOT ME! Scout's honor!)...leave without washing their hands! :eek: Is this a guy thing, or do the ladies sometimes skip that step too?</STRONG>

of course it's not a guy thing. i wash my hands all the time. but i don't have O.C.D.

[aeon-death]

TO Grotesqueangel:

just to let you know i'm not :mad:mad :mad: at you even though my posts seem so.

[Superchunk]

Well first of all i dont check out other guys...that is totally wrong...i dont know where u come from. and i also notice that at school most guys dont wash their hands....i might be paranoid but i use toilet paper to open the doors.

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Superchunk:
<STRONG>i might be paranoid but i use toilet paper to open the doors.</STRONG>


me 2

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Superchunk:
<STRONG>Well first of all i dont check out other guys...that is totally wrong...i dont know where u come from.</STRONG>


what are you talking about? :confused: i don't check out other guys :confused:

[Superman]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>It must have been the dog! :p :D ;)</STRONG>

That's no way to talk about unattattractive women! :D For the record I don't feel the need to check other guys mainly because its gross (think about it really) plus I'm not giving the impression that I like to check guys out. I also wash my hands too mainly because its hygenic to do so after you handle the equipment. :p

[Superman]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>And I'll slap you anytime anyplace! :p</STRONG>

Boy how many times have I heard that one... :D :p

[Superchunk]

Wasnt talking about you aeon. :D

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by aeon-death:
<STRONG>

what did i do? :confused: :p</STRONG>

Oh please :rolleyes:

YOU FARTED!! :eek: :p :D

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by aeon-death:
<STRONG>
that's not true!!!! how did you get that idea you pervert!</STRONG>

From guys, TV and movies! :p

Hey I told you before I'm a card carrying pervert! That's why I post here! :p :D ;)

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Kyle Katarn:
<STRONG>

Riiiiiight.... :rolleyes: :D</STRONG>

HEY IT'S TRUE!! :mad: :mad:

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Kyle Katarn:
<STRONG>

3. I don't mind using them, I guess it's what we get used to. So if men are more open about bathroom habits, it's because the sexist designers gave women more privacy options in showers and bathrooms!! ;) But most guys are in and out, bam, chop chop - FAST in other words! Too fast to pay attention to anyones "hardware," urinals or not. And most of the better ones have dividers for privacy as well.

Though there is one thing some guys do...(but NOT ME! Scout's honor!)...leave without washing their hands! :eek: Is this a guy thing, or do the ladies sometimes skip that step too?</STRONG>

You will probably find it is men who design the toilets!! :p :D

I always wash my hands but I have seen other women walk off and not wash their hands! :eek: :(

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by aeon-death:
<STRONG>TO Grotesqueangel:

just to let you know i'm not :mad:mad :mad: at you even though my posts seem so.</STRONG>

Thats OK aeon-death I love you too! ;) :D

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Superman:
<STRONG>

For the record I don't feel the need to check other guys mainly because its gross (think about it really) plus I'm not giving the impression that I like to check guys out. I also wash my hands too mainly because its hygenic to do so after you handle the equipment. :p</STRONG>

Yeah right! That's not what Greengoblin told me!!

:p ;)

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Superchunk:
<STRONG>Well first of all i dont check out other guys...that is totally wrong...i dont know where u come from. and i also notice that at school most guys dont wash their hands....i might be paranoid but i use toilet paper to open the doors.</STRONG>

Checking out other guys is wrong but smelling your own farts is alright!! :p ;)

I think some of you guys are in denial and just don't want to admit to it!! ;) :D

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Superman:
<STRONG>

Boy how many times have I heard that one... :D :p</STRONG>

In your dreams!! :p :D

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

Oh please :rolleyes:

YOU FARTED!! :eek: :p :D</STRONG>


oh yeah? i don't remeber i ever farted while talking to you.
then tell me what was my fart smell like eh?

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

Oh please :rolleyes:

YOU FARTED!! :eek: :p :D</STRONG>

or maybe you just heard it? if so how did you know that was me?

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

From guys, TV and movies! :p
</STRONG>

oh yeah, that's convincing

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

Hey I told you before I'm a card carrying pervert! That's why I post here! :p :D ;)</STRONG>


no, you never told me that. :confused:

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

Thats OK aeon-death I love you too! ;) :D</STRONG>

GEE!!! thanks!

oh shoot! now i feel guilty about my previous posts. i feel guilty to..... never mind, i love you too :D

[tyler_durden]

Originally posted by Kyle Katarn:
<STRONG>

Hmm, 3 points...

1. :D

2. HEY! :mad: ;)

3. I don't mind using them, I guess it's what we get used to. So if men are more open about bathroom habits, it's because the sexist designers gave women more privacy options in showers and bathrooms!! ;) But most guys are in and out, bam, chop chop - FAST in other words! Too fast to pay attention to anyones "hardware," urinals or not. And most of the better ones have dividers for privacy as well.

Though there is one thing some guys do...(but NOT ME! Scout's honor!)...leave without washing their hands! :eek: Is this a guy thing, or do the ladies sometimes skip that step too?</STRONG>


Unfortunately I think that this is a habit that a lot of people (men and women) have gotten into. Even when I am at the bar I wash my hands, if possible (some bars don't provide soap or paper towels. Even when I am totally hammered, in fact I make a more of a point to do it when I am drunk.

I have talked to my wife about it (she agrees with me and always washes her hands when possible). She has told me that she is suprised how many women walk out of public restrooms without washing theirs hands.

I was at a friends apartment once, and not only did he pea with the door open (my wife was there too) but he proceded to make us supper without washing his hands. :mad:

[tyler_durden]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

HEY WOMEN DON'T HAVE SMELLY FARTS :mad: It must have been the dog! :p :D ;)</STRONG>

Typical woman, never taking the blame when its your fault.

:mad: ;) :D

[Superchunk]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

Checking out other guys is wrong but smelling your own farts is alright!! :p ;)

I think some of you guys are in denial and just don't want to admit to it!! ;) :D</STRONG>
I never smelled my own fart on purpose but i think the point in this thread was that why we dont find our own farts that disgusting as in other peoples. Looking at some other guys hardwear is totally wrong unless your gay, i guess. I know 2 guys who smelt their own fart on purpose but it was only to make us laugh.
:p

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by aeon-death:
<STRONG>


oh yeah? i don't remeber i ever farted while talking to you.
then tell me what was my fart smell like eh?</STRONG>

Hey I make it a point never to smell another persons fart unless I can't help it. Like I'm in the tram and someone farts! :eek: :mad: Man I hate it when they do that!!

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by aeon-death:
<STRONG>


no, you never told me that. :confused:</STRONG>

Well now you know! I've always admitted I'm a pervert and proud of it. :D ;)

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by tyler_durden:
<STRONG>


Unfortunately I think that this is a habit that a lot of people (men and women) have gotten into. Even when I am at the bar I wash my hands, if possible (some bars don't provide soap or paper towels. Even when I am totally hammered, in fact I make a more of a point to do it when I am drunk.

I have talked to my wife about it (she agrees with me and always washes her hands when possible). She has told me that she is suprised how many women walk out of public restrooms without washing theirs hands.

I was at a friends apartment once, and not only did he pea with the door open (my wife was there too) but he proceded to make us supper without washing his hands. :mad:</STRONG>

I work in a hotel and I've seen girls that work in the restaurant go to the toilet and walk out without washing their hands! :eek:
:(

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by tyler_durden:
<STRONG>

Typical woman, never taking the blame when its your fault.

:mad: ;) :D</STRONG>

Why should we when there are plenty of men and dogs around! :p ;) :D

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Superchunk:
<STRONG>
I never smelled my own fart on purpose but i think the point in this thread was that why we dont find our own farts that disgusting as in other peoples. Looking at some other guys hardwear is totally wrong unless your gay, i guess. I know 2 guys who smelt their own fart on purpose but it was only to make us laugh.
:p</STRONG>

I thought looking at another guy's hardware was more of a "I'm bigger than you" thing or "Gee I wish I was as big as him!" :eek: Rather than a gay thing. :D ;)

[Loaded Weapon]

I just let one. ;)

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Loaded Weapon:
<STRONG>I just let one. ;)</STRONG>

Damn you I wondered what that smell was I thought it was the cat!! :mad: :p ;) :D

[Stark]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

OK I admit we sometimes bad mouth guys as well! :o Usually about their pick up lines! :rolleyes:

</STRONG>

Good work. Nothing worse than the ol' cheesball lines. Anyone that thinks girls fall for that kinda crap needs to be badmouthed.

[Stark]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

And I'll slap you anytime anyplace! :p</STRONG>

Please? PLEASE?!?!? But not at the Star Bar...I'm not waiting an hour while you go do your bizz! ;)

[tyler_durden]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

I work in a hotel and I've seen girls that work in the restaurant go to the toilet and walk out without washing their hands! :eek:
:(</STRONG>

That is scary :eek: and sad :( at the same time......

When I used to work in the food biz I alway washed my hands.

Someone mentioned something about using toliet paper to open the door. I am really close to doing that as well. If there is someone else in the bathroom with me, I try to follow them out and catch the door with my foot so that I don't have to touch it. :cool:

[Superchunk]

Tyler ya i do the same thing i sometimes hope that somone will open the door from the other side or i lag behind the person waiting for him to open the door. And looking at another guys weewee is totally gay in my books.

[tyler_durden]

I just don't have the need to look at another male no matter what the situation is.

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Stark:
<STRONG>

Please? PLEASE?!?!? But not at the Star Bar...I'm not waiting an hour while you go do your bizz! ;)</STRONG>

Hey sometimes we have to wait in a queue. :p ;)

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by tyler_durden:
<STRONG>

Someone mentioned something about using toliet paper to open the door. I am really close to doing that as well. If there is someone else in the bathroom with me, I try to follow them out and catch the door with my foot so that I don't have to touch it. :cool:</STRONG>

I've used my elbow the same way so I don't have to touch the door! :eek: :(

[tyler_durden]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

I've used my elbow the same way so I don't have to touch the door! :eek: :(</STRONG>

They need to put garbage cans by the exit door of every public bathroom. That is the main reason that I don't get a paper towel or piece of toliet paper to open the door, there is no where near by to easily dispose of it.

[Frizzo the Clown]

I used to use my penis to open the door, but I got tired of people looking at me funny.

[Superchunk]

Elbow??!!u still get germs and stuff. yeah theres no garbage can near by i just throw it on the flow....what r the janitors for?

[Stark]

Originally posted by Grotesqueangel:
<STRONG>

Hey sometimes we have to wait in a queue. :p ;)</STRONG>

That's the downside of being a girl, eh? For us, any convenient tree, bush, wall or even other person, will do! :p ;) ;)

[Crowfx]

i never flush the urinal with my hand, i kick the handle with my foot .. if possible
i'll have the paper towels dispenser already with paper hanging out of it before washing my hands (that way i don't have to touch the towel dispenser's crank again after washing my hands) then i can just rip the paper towel off and use it to turn off the sink and open the bathroom door...

[aeon-death]

Originally posted by CrowFX:
<STRONG>i never flush the urinal with my hand, i kick the handle with my foot .. if possible
i'll have the paper towels dispenser already with paper hanging out of it before washing my hands (that way i don't have to touch the towel dispenser's crank again after washing my hands) then i can just rip the paper towel off and use it to turn off the sink and open the bathroom door...</STRONG>

that's exactly the same things i do all the time!!!!

[aeon-death]

i thought i was the only one on this planet who does those.

[Superchunk]

Flushing.....whats that.....lol
and besides who takes a duke in a public washroom?

[Superman]

Originally posted by Frizzo the Clown:
<STRONG>I used to use my penis to open the door, but I got tired of people looking at me funny.</STRONG>

That's funny because there are some women who do that too.

[Warpedchick]

Originally posted by Stark:
<STRONG>

That's the downside of being a girl, eh? For us, any convenient tree, bush, wall or even other person, will do! :p ;) ;)</STRONG>

Yip that's where you guys are lucky! There is always a queue in the female toilets probably because most of them go to the toilet in twos. ;) :D

[tyler_durden]

Originally posted by CrowFX:
<STRONG>i never flush the urinal with my hand, i kick the handle with my foot .. if possible
i'll have the paper towels dispenser already with paper hanging out of it before washing my hands (that way i don't have to touch the towel dispenser's crank again after washing my hands) then i can just rip the paper towel off and use it to turn off the sink and open the bathroom door...</STRONG>

That's actually a really good idea, that would just take planning and thinking ahead....I don't think I could handle that when nature is calling!!

:rolleyes: :D

[D-fence]

just an off topic comment.. the new Chat-rooms RULEZZzz! great to finally meet ya all in "person".

(although Jbond scared the hell out of me..but that's another story :p )

-thats all-

[D-fence]

*burb!*

(Ow! sorry! did that bring the forum back on top? :p)

[Malice]

Oh geez, is this thread still around?

[JBond]

It is now...

[Warpedchick]

Oh god it's another thebtskink's "worms"! :mad:

[aeon-death]

i kinda like this tread

[Olorin]

I once farted so hard that... I could hear i-it. :)

[Superman]

[quote]Originally posted by Olorin:
<strong>I once farted so hard that... I could hear i-it. :) </strong><hr></blockquote>

And feel it down your pants, eh?

[thebtskink]

[quote]Originally posted by Warpedchick:
<strong>Oh god it's another thebtskink's "worms"! :mad: </strong><hr></blockquote>

I'm gonna bite your head off.

[Warpedchick]

[quote]Originally posted by thebtskink:
<strong>

I'm gonna bite your head off.</strong><hr></blockquote>

Try it worm breath! :mad: :p ;)

[thebtskink]

[quote]Originally posted by Warpedchick:
<strong>

Try it worm breath! :mad: :p ;) </strong><hr></blockquote>

YARG!!!! :D

[Warpedchick]

[quote]Originally posted by thebtskink:
<strong>

YARG!!!! :D </strong><hr></blockquote>

What's the matter? Pants too tight!! :p ;) :D

[aeon-death]

[quote]Originally posted by Superman:
<strong>

And feel it down your pants, eh?</strong><hr></blockquote>

i once farted so hard that i realy felt it :p

[Superman]

[quote]Originally posted by thebtskink:
<strong>

YARG!!!! :D </strong><hr></blockquote>

Hey that spells "GRAY" backwards, it's a subliminal message! Quick! Kill all the gray people!

[beemanbone]

[quote]Originally posted by Superman:
<strong>Quick! Kill all the gray people!</strong><hr></blockquote>
the elderly??

[D-fence]

[quote]Originally posted by Superman:
<strong>

Quick! Kill all the gray people!</strong><hr></blockquote>

aliens?

[ 10-22-2001: Message edited by: D-fence ]</p>

[Superman]

[quote]Originally posted by beemanbone:
<strong>the elderly??</strong><hr></blockquote>

Yes! Can't you see they're taking over!? They drive slowly to prevent us from getting to a safe destination in time. They get free coffee refills and try to drink all our caffeine in the world. They have all sorts of discounts and are crippling us in every way! I declare war on those bastards!

[Stark]

And have you seen them on half-price Tuesday at the movies? They're like VULTURES...LOCUSTS...!! And they won't shut up with the snorting and throat-clearing. There was one old guy today...if I hadn't have been outnumbered 10 to one (there was 11 of us in the cinema), I'd have stood up for myself. But then they may well have beaten me very slowly to death.
Someone has to do something.

[Superman]

We must band together and eradicate this threat. Who's with me!

[ 10-23-2001: Message edited by: Superman ]</p>

[Stark]

I'm with you, Supes. How can I not be? How can I go to the cinema again and feel safe if we don't do something about these phlegm-encrusted, cane-carrying, heavily bespectacled tyrants?

[Superman]

We need to form a coalition to inform the uninformed!

[Crowfx]

mothballs, they all smell like mothballs !!

[Stark]

They can't see over steering wheels!

[JBond]

[quote]Originally posted by Superman:
<strong>We need to form a coalition to inform the uninformed!</strong><hr></blockquote>

HEY! We already have one!!! :mad:

[tyler_durden]

I have a group that I am in that can help us if we choose to go the mischief and mayhem route. We have many cells capable of operating without central leadership....

[Malice]

This topic is still open!?

[JBond]

Depressing, isn't it?

[Superman]

[quote]Originally posted by tyler_durden:
<strong>I have a group that I am in that can help us if we choose to go the mischief and mayhem route. We have many cells capable of operating without central leadership....</strong><hr></blockquote>

Then we shall form an uneasy alliance which will consist of lot's of anti-social behavior and making soap from fat people! We'll use the soap against old people, throw it at them.

[D-fence]

[quote]Originally posted by JBond:
<strong>Depressing, isn't it?</strong><hr></blockquote>

yes it is! If i get my hands on the one that started this piece of fartchunk! :mad:

[D-fence]

Is it true that you let one last one blow when you die? Maybe that's why my pet-goldfish had that weird smile on his face when he laid there on his back... :confused:

Aw Jawsie.. You’re still missed around here! :(

[LOTR]

this topic is so weird

[D-fence]

[quote]Originally posted by LOTR:
<strong>this topic is so weird</strong><hr></blockquote>

Not when you look at it from the moon! because in the purple little man lies the secret to the REAL truth behind JFK's death! you just have to look harder man! drugs! DRUGS!! WHOOHOOOOOOOOO!!!!

*burb*

(did i tell ya i smell my own farts?..)

[Superman]

[quote]Originally posted by D-fence:
<strong>

Not when you look at it from the moon! because in the purple little man lies the secret to the REAL truth behind JFK's death! you just have to look harder man! drugs! DRUGS!! WHOOHOOOOOOOOO!!!!

*burb*

(did i tell ya i smell my own farts?..)</strong><hr></blockquote>

I think Smurfs killed JFK. Think about it. Think real hard.

[D-fence]

[quote]Originally posted by Superman:
<strong>

I think Smurfs killed JFK. Think about it. Think real hard.</strong><hr></blockquote>

I personally think it was George Lucas and his gang, but that's just me.. I mean, anyone twisted enough to come up with something like Jar Jar.. :(
Think about it. Think real hard.

[Stark]

I'd forgotten about this topic. My girlfriend farted in bed this morning. :(

[Lazlo Panaflex]

I once put a topic on liking your farts yet it got axed, but this topic is still going, is there some sort of favoritism?

[Superman]

[quote]Originally posted by Lazlo Panaflex:
<strong>I once put a topic on liking your farts yet it got axed, but this topic is still going, is there some sort of favoritism?</strong><hr></blockquote>

Probably.

[Superman]

[quote]Originally posted by Stark:
<strong>I'd forgotten about this topic. My girlfriend farted in bed this morning. :( </strong><hr></blockquote>

Sorry, thought you were still asleep. J/k.

[Stark]

Show me some respect next time, Super-*****! ;)

[D-fence]

Man.. we were so young an innocent back then! :p

[Rogue]

:funny: I'm trying to figure out how a thread about farting got to 7 pages.

[Kyle Katarn]

"shhhh, children. Beg the question - RUE the answer!"
-Some sensei dude of Wolverine's :p

[redman]

Originally posted by Rogue
:funny: I'm trying to figure out how a thread about farting got to 7 pages.

thats exactly what i was thinking. the interest in farting must be astounding.

[IdahoMR2man]

Oh my god!!! A farting thread!!!! How in the hell did I miss this?!?!

I have a couple questions.

If you fart in space and weren't wearing a space suit, would it propel you forward?

And is it possible to fart so hard that you rip your underwear?

And also is there such a thing as "the brown noise"?

[D-fence]

Originally posted by IdahoMR2man


I have a couple questions.

If you fart in space and weren't wearing a space suit, would it propel you forward?

And is it possible to fart so hard that you rip your underwear?

And also is there such a thing as "the brown noise"?

1: If you rip a REALLY hard one.. yeah, sure! it could work! although you still wouldn’t go very fast IMO. But then again, my grandma could rip farts with a power equal to an F5, so I’m strongly convinced she could have been able to fart herself to mars and beyond. :alien:

2: Once again; it's all a matter of FORCE. And the force was strong with my grandma. So I'm sure there are people out there like her who are able to do it.

3: I once ate a box of Belgian bonbons, half a Noël Bread, a six pack of a B-brand, two rolls of peppermint, a large steak with my uncle's 'Special dip' spilled all over it, and four waffles filled with cream (which on second viewing appeared to be well over the expansion date) all within 70 minutes.
The sound I made two hours later while sitting on the toilet of my nieces house, was something I can only describe as ''BROWN NOISE". So to answer your question: YES. It's out there. :(

[IdahoMR2man]

What if every person in the world faced west and farted all at once. Would the counter force be enough to slow the planet's rotation down?

[D-fence]

:lol::lol::lol:

[wiginabox]

My farts a full of wonderousness

[D-fence]

Originally posted by wiginabox
My farts a full of wonderousness

Please... elaborate :p

[Ian]

nice post people, I was known for having some very stinky farts at school and college lol and I love the smell of my own farts. Lol

[IdahoMR2man]

When my buddy Tim farts it sounds like his butt is laughing.

[D-fence]

Originally posted by IdahoMR2man
When my buddy Tim farts it sounds like his butt is laughing.

:lol:

This Thread is getting more and more honest everytime I visit it! :p

[Brock Landers]

I once went on an amusement park ride called The Chamber of Farts


;)

[Ian]

lol!

[droidguy1119]

Wow. I'm...glad I came in here.

[D-fence]

Originally posted by droidguy1119
Wow. I'm...glad I came in here.

Eehm.. WHY?! :p

[Highfire]

Originally posted by D-fence
Eehm.. WHY?! :p

because this is a funny thread

[D-fence]

well in that case: *BUMP!*

[IdahoMR2man]

I farted.

[Cookie Monster]

One time i ate a cookie and farted... happened to anyone else?

[D-fence]

Originally posted by Cookie Monster
One time i ate a cookie and farted... happened to anyone else?

no. not with a cookie. But it did happen during a Kiss goodbye with my (ex) girlfriend though. :(

[Highfire]

Originally posted by D-fence
no. not with a cookie. But it did happen during a Kiss goodbye with my (ex) girlfriend though. :(

:funny:

[droidguy1119]

One time in a class I farted. I had been just about to sit down -- if I had gotten a centimeter farther, I would have smothered it into the chair -- but instead, the noise between my butt and the hard plastic chair simply made it echo loudly through the classroom. I was very interested in my book for the rest of the day.

[Cookie Monster]

Originally posted by droidguy1119
One time in a class I farted. I had been just about to sit down -- if I had gotten a centimeter farther, I would have smothered it into the chair -- but instead, the noise between my butt and the hard plastic chair simply made it echo loudly through the classroom. I was very interested in my book for the rest of the day. ROFL

[droidguy1119]

Glad I've amused you.

[D-fence]

Today my sister of 16 years young let one rip that smelled EXACTLY like a fresh Christmas tree! It was both disturbing and intriguing at the same time.. My father couldn't stop lauging at the table. (yes.. it happened DURING dinner :()

And NO. I'm not making this up. This thread was the first thing I had to think about when I smelled it. :alien:

[D-fence]

jack nicholson.

[EvilDeadNDN]

what kind of excuses you guys make up when you fart?

I always blame it on the geese flying overhead or the barking spiders.

and also the heater went out over here....*coughs and walks away quietly*

heh

[CapricornDevil]

You could always use my father's excuse when he farts..."Hey, kids, did you see that elephant run by?"

[droidguy1119]

I've been sitting here making fake farting noises with my mouth for some 10 minutes and no reason behind it.

[Catshe]

what its a private thing until you live with someone

[Inval1d]

I fart a lot now. They smell funny too. :D

[D-fence]

lets see.. what happens when.. I.. push.. this.. button....


BUMP!!!!! :omg:

[boydston_14]

Holy crap, a 2-year bump! Well done, D-fence.

[The WupZter]

This is simple. Loud farts are normally odorless. Silent farts are typically warm and insipid. And the ones where you fart right before you take a dump, those are the worst.

[Papa]

Why is there a thread about farts? ;)

[FilmJerk]

its twice as bad when you got two butt holes

[ZombieMan]

Oooooh, hey this is my kind of thread right here!!! I love bathroom humor! Farts rule!!!! I always wanted to catch a fart in a jar, spray paint it blue and let it go, and watch it fly around the room. ;)

[boydston_14]

Why is there a thread about farts? ;)

Because, as the thread title says, farts are the big mystery of life.

[todd philip]

Do girls fart?

[boydston_14]

One day when I was in gym class, there was this out-of-shape guy in my class who I got partnered with. I had to hold his feet down and count for him as he did sit ups. Guess what happened? The guy farted in my face. The whole class laughed.

[SuperRyan]

Do girls fart?

Yes. Believe it or not.

[todd philip]

Yes. Believe it or not.HA

next thing your gonna tell me is that girls grow hair on their legs and armpits :rolleyes:

[D-fence]

Big Event: Yesterday, for the first time in my 26 years on Gods fresh aired earth, I let one go that I myself couldn't bare smelling.
I mean, the first fart in my life that I had to run away from; If that doesn't justify a gigantic bumb like this, I don't know what will.

Farting, the big mystery in life.

[ZombieMan]

Wow, another HUGE bump, haha!!! I love farts!!!

[Ramplate]

thanks for sharing.

I fart therefore I am

[Dr. Osterman]

Uh, my farts smell like farts.

[Deexan]

In England, farts are called "pumps".

[Ramplate]

In England, farts are called "pumps".

Pumps are a type of shoes among other things here lol

[Dr. Osterman]

Pumps are a type of shoes among other things here lol

In England, pumps are called court shoes. Don't ask me why.

[Ramplate]

In England, pumps are called court shoes. Don't ask me why.

Well, at least both here in the US and there in England, a fart can come from your fanny

rofl

[Deexan]

In England, farts are also referred to as "trumps".

E.g.:

"What's that smell?"

"Oh that's me, I just trumped."

There's even a playground rhyme about it...

If it's solid
it's a dump,
If it's gas:
pump or trump.

[Catshe]

In England, farts are also referred to as "trumps".

E.g.:

"What's that smell?"

"Oh that's me, I just trumped."

There's even a playground rhyme about it...

If it's solid
it's a dump,
If it's gas:
pump or trump.
thats a first for me never heared that be for.
and no one has heared my daughter, she could win a meddle. (she eats turnip because it makes you trump) iam a bad mother

[docstop]

this is one of the most informative threads ever!

[Deexan]

thats a first for me never heared that be for.
and no one has heared my daughter, she could win a meddle. (she eats turnip because it makes you trump) iam a bad mother

That could be due to the fact I made it up specifically for that post.

Maybe an expert trumper such as your daughter could help it become the playground classic it really should be?

[ZombieMan]

http://www.thestrangetimes.com/sitebuilder/images/Fart_joke-600x352.png

[JheyDC]

LOL..nice!

[ZombieMan]

^^^ HAHA, yup, I loved it and had to post it. ;)

[Catshe]

That could be due to the fact I made it up specifically for that post.

Maybe an expert trumper such as your daughter could help it become the playground classic it really should be?

hmmm my daughter singing trumping nursery rhymes i can see it now. do you think it will go to the tune of mama mia:)