Revenge of the Nerd

[JBond]

Welcome to Part 4 of the JBond fanfic uh...saga.

Here is part 1 of 11 parts in the whole story. It uh...gets better.

<Mirko walks into Tech’s office>

Mirko: Did I get any calls while I was away?
Tech: Yes, two. The first one was from the Publisher’s Clearing House, they said they knocked on your door last night and you yelled “Go away, I’m eating!”
Mirko: ...
Tech: So they left a phone number where they can be reached to pick up the check.
Mirko: Really?! That’s GREAT! So, what was the second call!?
Tech: The second call was the IRS claiming you owe about a million in cheated taxes...I gave them the number to the Publisher’s Clearing House.
Mirko: I see...

<Mirko depressingly walks back to his desk and shortly after, Frizzo, thebtskink and Olorin walk in>

Mirko: Well, William Shatner is still out there...thank you for finally coming back to the office...after TWO WEEKS!
thebtskink: Well we had just finished a task, we needed some time off!
Mirko: Well obviously you DIDN’T finish it! Anyway, there is no time to waste....why aren’t we all here?
Frizzo: We’re still waiting for Bond and Superman to return from the Mardi Gras.

<JBond walks in with many beaded necklaces around his neck>

Olorin: ...aren’t those given out to women who flash the cameras for those Girls Gone Wild videos?!?
Frizzo: Which can be bought for $9.99!
JBond: Oh yeah, but that’s not how I got them, I walked around with these and a camera so others would flash me! I wouldn’t have thought they’d do it for beads when it usually costs more to get them to do things like that!
Frizzo: About $50!
Olorin: Well that’s a relief.

<Superman walks in with beads around his neck>

Olorin: So I guess you also got those so girls to flash you!
Superman: No....they were handed out to me!

<Olorin steps away from Superman>

thebtskink: Ugh, there should be a fine for male exposure on the streets!
Frizzo: $200!
Mirko: *sigh* Ok listen, you guys have been doing a....pretty good job these couple of years.
JBond: It’s all you!
Superman: It’s been fun!
Olorin: You da man, Mirko!
Mirko: And I would be thrilled if you guys would help out in the next assignment…
JBond: That’s great!
Superman: I’m glad we can help
Olorin: You da man, Mirko!
Mirko: It’s just that...you guys are too damn stupid!!
JBond: ...
Superman: ...
Olorin: You da man, Mirko!
Mirko: That is why I’ve decided you are all going back to school for a little while before you go on this assignment.
Frizzo: ......I get to be Rodney Dangerfield!
thebtskink: Only if I get to be Billy Madison!
Superman: So what school are we going to?
Mirko: I’ve decided on LaFollette High School
JBond: Oh great, you just HAD to pick my old high school, didn’t you!
Mirko: You have a problem with it!?
JBond: None whatsoever!
Mirko: Good...you are dismissed.

<Mirko walks over to Tech’s desk in his office and notices a completed Rubik’s Cube>

Mirko: Ah! I’m glad to know I have an employee that actually has the brains to do something as complicated as a Rubik’s Cube!
Tech: Well...I actually bought that a week ago completed and haven’t touched it yet because I know I would never be able to get it back...
Mirko: Maybe you should go with them...you know...keep an eye on them.
Tech: You got it!

<Tech steps out from behind his desk to show that he is in his boxer shorts>

Tech: What? I’m behind the desk all day!

<Tech leaves the office>

Mirko: Hmm

<Mirko picks up the Rubik’s Cube and twists it in every way and places it back down>

Mirko: Hahaha!

[Malice]

I cant wait to see this one...

[Frizzo the Clown]

I think this is going to be great as well!

[slinger]

Part 4? Well for a moment I thought my plans were going to ruined for my next one. But not really. Anyway its good.

[TyRoss]

Oh yeah heroes go back to school and hilarity ensues.

[Olorin]

You da man, Mir... Bond!

[Moe Szyslak]

Mirko: It’s just that...you guys are too damn stupid!!
JBond: ...
Superman: ...
Olorin: You da man, Mirko!

Hehe, that was the funniest part to me.

[JBond]

I would have posted part 2 sooner but my internet only works at night...seriously, at about 5-6 PM it will work just fine, then the next morning, nothing.

JBond: Do you guys really think we’re just dumb trouble makers?

*BEEP*

Superman: Hold on, it’s 7:00, I have to call my parole officer.
Frizzo: Well it’s not that we’re dumb, we just choose to be.
Olorin: ....I think “we’re” dumb because Frizzo brings down the average I.Q. among us.
Superman: <On phone> Dammit, going to a strip club does NOT violate my parole!!...well yeah, it was in Switzerland, but have you SEEN the Swedish chicks!?.....no that was NOT a bribe!

<A yellow school bus pulls up in front of them>

JBond: Uh...I guess this is our ride
Olorin: I don’t remember ever taking a yellow bus to high school...
JBond: Well it’s a high school and elementary school combined.

<They get on the bus and sit in front of some 8 year olds>

Sam: I don’t know WHAT you’re talking about, you dummy! Batman can beat up Superman EASILY!
Fred: No way! Superman is a supreme being from another PLANET! Not some mutant rodent wannabe!

thebtskink: Well this is annoying!

Sam: You take that back Fred! Batman has a WAAAAY cooler outfit, Superman could audition for Power Rangers.

Superman: ...

Fred: Yeah well...you...uh...SHUT UP! Superman could beat up you!
Sam: Could not!
Fred: Could too!
Sam: Could n-

<Superman turns around and takes Sam’s hands and hits him with them>

Superman: Stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself!

<A kid continually stares at Frizzo>

Frizzo: ......what the hell is your problem!
Bob: My problem? I’m not the one with a rainbow wig.
Frizzo: Actually that’s my real hair...now go away!
Bob: Oh that’s real mature, you big freak!
Frizzo: Hey my dad could beat up your dad!!!
Bob: Could not! My dad is a black belt in Karate!
Frizzo: Well my Dad is a double black belt, so NAH!
Olorin: Oh thank God we’re here!

<They get out and enter the school, Tech greets them there>

Tech: Mirko has asked me to come here to make sure you get to your classes, so I’ve gone in already and chosen classes that I thought would provide for the most wacky situations that depend on the separate personalities of each of you.
Superman: Good man...
Tech: So here’s your schedules...and I’ve also made you sack lunches, I tore off the crusts...have a good day!

<Tech leaves>

thebtskink: Well this is just degrading...ooo, Lunchables!

<Everyone goes to the classes that are assigned to them on the schedule>

<Olorin goes to his class>

Mr. Harflebrooken: Good day class, and welcome to Electronics 101. In this class, you will create inventions using common household electronics and will be graded on them. I have provided you with many objects courtesy of Radio Shack...although they don’t know. Enjoy!

<30 minutes later>

Mr. Harflebrooken: And what are you working on, Sir?
Olorin: Well, at home I have WAY too many appliances, so I’ve made many remotes to use on all of them. But even then there are too many remotes, so I made a special remote to use for the other remotes!
Mr. Harflebrooken: I see...
Olorin: So in total, I made one remote for the DVD players, one remote for the TV’s...and one remote to rule them all!
Mr. Harflebrooken: I see....and what is that strange writing on the master remote, I’ve never seen anything quite like it! What does it say...
Olorin: It says Mitsubishi.
Mr. Harflebrooken: Amazing!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

<Superman ends up in a science class>

Mr. Celsius: Well as you know I have returned from Hawaii recently and as BORING as my slides were the last 5 class periods, I only have a few left of some the Hawaiian spiders.

In this first slide, you will notice the rare <a href="http://starbulletin.com/96/09/17/features/spider.gif" target="_blank">Hawaiian Smiling Spider</a> that can be spotted by the natural smiley faces on their backs. Some certain specimens have been known to resemble certain people when looked at like this particular spider <a href="http://www.comingsoon.net/jbond/8.jpg" target="_blank">here</a> which is known as the Robis Loweicarcus variety. Now on to new material...well old material but new as in it’s been a week since we were last discussing it. We were going over the laws of Thermodynamics. Can anyone tell me what they were?

Doomsday: I know! The first one is you cannot create or destroy energy.

&lt;Superman melts the clock so the minute hand sags down to the class end time&gt;

Doomsday: ...and the second one is that all things are always increasing in disorder.

&lt;Superman drinks some liquid labeled Sulfuric Acid and falls over appearing dead then arises a little while later just fine&gt;

Doomsday: ...you’re trying to make me look bad, aren’t you?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;Frizzo ends up in Tae-Kwon-Do&gt;

Fred Bait: Welcome class, in this class you will learn to hit, kick, break, shatter, mutilate and destroy your enemy before they even know what hit them....but only for self defense! I am your instructor, Fred Bait, but you will refer to me as Master! Many of my past students really didn’t get the hang of it...they failed, so do it!

&lt;Frizzo walks in&gt;

dubloth: But what if we don’t want to, Master Bait! You can’t make us!
Master Bait: Well the school is generally against me forcing you, but you will or else! Now first thing we will do is a warm up, climbing a rope! You will do it, in the back. &lt;Points to dubloth&gt;
dubloth: I can’t, Master Bait. Not in front of the others, I’d be too embarrassed. What if I can’t get up?
Master Bait: Damn, it’s not hard!
dubloth: Can you show me how to, Master Bait?
Master Bait: Oh alright, here, get in front of me.
Frizzo: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

&lt;Frizzo goes running from the room screaming&gt;

<small>[ 02-17-2002, 05:43 PM: Message edited by: JBond ]</small>

[Frizzo the Clown]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by JBond:
<strong>&lt;Frizzo ends up in Tae-Kwon-Do&gt;

Fred Bait: Welcome class, in this class you will learn to hit, kick, break, shatter, mutilate and destroy your enemy before they even know what hit them....but only for self defense! I am your instructor, Fred Bait, but you will refer to me as Master! Many of my past students really didn’t get the hang of it...they failed, so do it!

&lt;Frizzo walks in&gt;

dubloth: But what if we don’t want to, Master Bait! You can’t make us!
Master Bait: Well the school is generally against me forcing you, but you will or else! Now first thing we will do is a warm up, climbing a rope! You will do it, in the back. &lt;Points to dubloth&gt;
dubloth: I can’t, Master Bait. Not in front of the others, I’d be too embarrassed. What if I can’t get up?
Master Bait: Damn, it’s not hard!
dubloth: Can you show me how to, Master Bait?
Master Bait: Oh alright, here, get in front of me.
Frizzo: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

&lt;Frizzo goes running from the room screaming&gt;</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Not suprising that I end up with the masturbation joke.....I like it! :D

[TyRoss]

I laughed and laughed and laughed then laughed some more.

[Moe Szyslak]

If this was posted by anyone else besides Jibbs it would be closed and the person banned. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" />

I mean, good work....keep it up. Uh, damn.

[Malice]

Too Funny...

thebtskink: Well this is just degrading...ooo, Lunchables!

That is my favorite line....

Good work

[beemanbone]

Anything that has a masturbation joke is A-OK in my book!

Hilarious, JBond. You are the master.............................bater.

sorry

[bbf2]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by beemanbone:
<strong>Anything that has a masturbation joke is A-OK in my book!

Hilarious, JBond. You are the master.............................bater.

sorry</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Don't apologize, he is well aware and embraces that fact.

[JBond]

&lt;JBond looks at his schedule and his first class is “Women Studies”&gt;

JBond: Alright! Thank you, TECH! Great place to meet chicks…

&lt;JBond walks in to see 30 disappointed guys look up at him&gt;

Class: Damn.
JBond: Damn.

&lt;Male teacher looks at the class and sees it’s all guys&gt;

Teacher: Damn.

&lt;The teacher leaves the room&gt;

JBond: ...well screw this.

&lt;JBond leaves and walks down the hallway to find Superman sitting in the waiting room for the principal’s office&gt;

JBond: What are you doing here?
Superman: I was sent here from Chemistry, I broke the law
JBond: What law is that?
Superman: The law of thermodynamics.
JBond: Damn, is there a fine for that?
Superman: Apparently so...I also broke some things. But Bond, aren’t beakers meant to be broken?
JBond: I thought those were “rules”?
Superman: So why aren’t you in class?
JBond: No women.
Superman: I am so sorry, Bond...

&lt;The Principal walks out of his class&gt;

Principal bbf2: Well, wouldn’t you know it. Bond, the only person to graduate with dishonors. You left two years ago, what are you doing here?
JBond: I forgot to take one of my finals.
Principal bbf2: Right... &lt;Looks at Superman&gt; and who are you and what are you doing here?
Superman: I work at “INSANE”, our boss sent us here because we’re incompetent.
Principal bbf2: INSANE, huh? I’ve heard of you...I don’t doubt your story, bunch of troublemakers!
Superman: Oh come on, we’re not that bad!

*BEEP*

Superman: Ah, 8:00. Got to call my parole officer.
Principal bbf2: Well at least only two of you are here…

&lt;Frizzo runs in&gt;

Frizzo: My God, that was just WRONG! That teacher should be BANNED!
JBond: Someone say banned?!
Principal bbf2: Which teacher is that.
Frizzo: The Tae-Kwan-Do instructor.
Principal bbf2: Say no more, we get many complaints.

&lt;Olorin walks in&gt;

JBond: Oh now what? What are you doing here?
Olorin: I tried to take over the school with my master remote...my precious...
Frizzo: So uh...where is thebtskink?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Ms. Pixi: Good MORNING, class! Today. We are going to do some finger-painting, take a nap, do STORY TIME and then another nap!
50 Little Kids: Yay!!!!
thebtskink: What the hell? I guess Tech doesn’t think much of me...&lt;starts to eat a worm dipped in paste&gt; Crud...my last one!

LOTR: Look! Friend!

&lt;All 50 kids jump onto thebtskink&gt;

thebtskink: GAAAAA!! I need me worms!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Superman: Well I’m getting bored of just sitting here, let’s go and get him and go lunch.
Olorin: Sounds good to me.
JBond: And me!

&lt;The four leave in search of thebtskink&gt;

Principal bbf2: ...weren’t one or two of them supposed to be punished...oh I’ve wasted my life.

Olorin: So where do you think he is, Bond?
JBond: How should I know?
Olorin: You used to go here.
JBond: Yeah but I didn’t write his schedule, I don’t know which one he is in!
Olorin: Well find him, dammit! I’m hungry!
Frizzo: HEY SKINK! I GOT A CAN OF WORMS RIGHT HERE!!

&lt;As Frizzo says this, three or four kids shoot out of a doorway and into the lockers on the other side of the hallway shortly followed by thebtskink shooting out as well and running into Frizzo&gt;

thebtskink: GIMME!

&lt;Frizzo gives him some Gummy Worms&gt;

thebtskink: The margarine of worms...

&lt;The group goes to the cafeteria and gets in line&gt;

Olorin: So what do you suppose they serve here?
Frizzo: You know, I am getting sick and tired of your B*TCHING!!
Olorin: ....what?!

&lt;Frizzo pushes Olorin into the tuna casserole&gt;

Frizzo: Sorry bout that...I mixed many medications and I get these uncontrollable madness sprees....hope you understand.
Olorin: I’ll see you at 4:00...by the willow trees!!
thebtskink: I need....my refill....of worms!

&lt;thebtskink is served spaghetti onto his plate by Warpedchick&gt;

thebtskink: Don’t toy with me, woman!
JBond: Yeah, I’ll take the apple juice box over there.
Warpedchick: You don’t want the juice.
JBond: Yes...I do. I’m thirsty.
Warpedchick: No, you DON’T!
JBond: I asked for the juice, it means I wanted it. Hand it over!
Warpedchick: I don’t think you want it, wait....no I’m sure of it, and you don’t want it.
JBond: Dammit, I want the JUICE!!
Warpedchick: You can’t handle the juice!!!

&lt;The group leaves to sit down and an apple juice box hits Bond in the back of the head, snickering is heard from behind&gt;

[Olorin]

Bond, this is some of the funniest stuff I have read on ComingSoon in recent months! Great job!

[Moe Szyslak]

Haha, "You can't handle the juice!"

[TyRoss]

In the words of John Lithgow.. BRILLIANT!!

[Malice]

The Masterpiece continues...

[JBond]

Thank you.

I will post the next part later cause I work today and I'm at school now.

[thebtskink]

Don’t toy with me, Bont!

[bbf2]

LOL! That thing with skink in Kindergarden was one of the funniest things I've read in awhile!

[JBond]

Superman: Hey Bond, what’s that you got in your hand?
JBond: Oh it’s just a new gadget of mine, it cuts through steel bars but only in a jail made by the crew of Bill Gates and it can only be used at 3:47 P.M.
Superman: Wow, that’s quite specific...makes it seem very unlikely that you’ll be able to use it!
JBond: Yeah you’re probably right...
thebtskink: I need me worms!
JBond: Oh I almost forgot, skink. I brought some worms for you in case you ran out!

&lt;thebtskink eats them and the Popeye music plays and thebtskink’s muscles grow with one of them having a picture of an anchor in it with a worm wrapped around it&gt;

JBond: Well I’m going to class.
Olorin: What do you have now?
JBond: Oh I don’t know...I was planning on just walking in on one.
Superman: Well then let’s stick together...these people scare me...

&lt;The group walks into a random room&gt;

Olorin: Wow...we somehow accidentally picked the girls locker room, maybe we should at least check that it’s a classroom first.
JBond: Yes, hehe....accident....

&lt;They walk in to a classroom and sit down&gt;

Mr. Slinger: Now last time in class we said we we’re going to elect a new class president. so here are your forms.

&lt;slinger passes out forms for voting&gt;

JBond: Blah.....I have to go to the bathroom!
slinger: You can go.
JBond: MEE-hee-hee!

&lt;JBond skips off to the bathroom or girls locker room....which...the world may never know&gt;

slinger: Ok, it seems everyone is done. Hand them in.

&lt;slinger looks them over&gt;

slinger: Ok, we have 15 votes for Godzilla, 13 votes for Madness...and 3 votes for Pat Buchanan.
Madness: You idiots!! Was it SO difficult?!?
Superman: Hey, you didn’t read all of them!
slinger: Well...the remaining one was one of those joke “I vote for Superman” votes.

&lt;slinger notices he’s looking at Superman&gt;

slinger: A real vote...big day for you?
Superman: Oh no, all these years of “Superman” votes...those were real!
slinger: Uh huh...well anyway, now we’re going to take a personality test because I’m evil.

&lt;JBond returns&gt;
&lt;slinger passes the sheets out&gt;

Frizzo: So where were you Bond, in the ladies room I presume?
JBond: No....by no, I mean yes.

&lt;slinger walks by and checks the finished sheets&gt;

slinger: Let’s see...Mr. Frizzo the Clown....I’m not sure how you got humorous and homicidal on the same test, that’s just amazing!
Frizzo: It’s a gift!
slinger: And whose next, thebtskink....you filled multiple bubbles for many of the questions?
thebtskink: I made a picture with the fill-in bubbles, turn it sideways!!
slinger: ....oh God, you sick, sick man...Then there’s Madness-
Madness: Keep walking.
Slinger: Righto.

&lt;slinger walks over to Bond and looks at his&gt;

slinger: .......&lt;slinger punches Bond&gt; You are twisted!!....go to the nurse’s office about that nose.

&lt;Bond leaves&gt;
&lt;slinger lastly goes to look at Olorin’s personality test&gt;

slinger: Ok....uh huh....well that’s interesting.
Olorin: Yes?!
slinger: You failed.
Olorin: :(

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Nurse Lace: -only be contracted through cows!!
JBond: Forget about my blood for a minute…you have such beautiful eyes!
Nurse Lace: I bet you tell every girl that.
JBond: No, with most of them I complement their clothes, but DAMN! Wasn’t going to happen this time, babe!
Nurse Lace: .... &lt;punches Bond in the nose&gt; ...here, let me look at that.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;Bell rings, Frizzo jumps up on his desk&gt;

Frizzo: WHOO-HOO, on to the ar-CADE!!...wow that just came out by habit!...I miss the 90’s...

&lt;The guys leave slinger’s class&gt;

Superman: So what do you guys have next, I got P.E.
Frizzo: Same
thebtskink: Here also
Olorin: I don’t...I have “Career Choices and Wise Planning”...but screw that, I’ll skip that and go with you guys.

&lt;They go over to the Gym&gt;

[Moe Szyslak]

I still have yet to make an appearance...what's up with that?

Um, good work even if I'm not in it. Keep it up Jibbs(even though I know you already have it all written).

[Link]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Moe Szyslak:
<strong>I still have yet to make an appearance...what's up with that?

Um, good work even if I'm not in it. Keep it up Jibbs(even though I know you already have it all written).</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I made a cameo and was Regis stole $1.00 and the other time Samuel L. Jackson supposedly shot me..

Good job Jbond!...Meh Girl's Locker Room..

[TyRoss]

Heh Olorin failed the personality test, good one.

[thebtskink]

I personally thought my picture was a piece of art.

[JBond]

Ed Snarzitkfroupyinky: Hello class, my name is Ed Snarzitkfroupyinky, but please, call me Mr. Snarzitkfroupyinky!
Frizzo: Mr. Snarkifropinky...you have a weird name.
Ed Snakzitsfrodoyimby: Well it wasn’t always like that, it was changed when my family entered the country. It used to be Snarzitkfroupyinkydrewiquertycilkjohnson.
Frizzo: Oh....sorry I asked.
Ed Snakarackenjohnson: Yes well, today we are going to work more on our Baseball skills, let’s head out to the field.

&lt;They head out to the field, a sign says “No Animals Allowed”&gt;

Superman: Hehe, animals can’t read...
Ed Snacknquertfrodocious: It is important to get into the mood of Baseball, and to do that I have devised a little exercise. You will all close your eyes and pretend you are great baseball players, now I know they tell you to “be yourself”, but that’s bullcrap, you guys won’t amount to anything. So close your eyes...think about it...now who are you?
thebtskink: I am Ken Griffey Jr., hitting home runs all the time!
Ed Swartzchildradius: Good, good...
Olorin: I am Barry Bonds, hitting more home runs then Griffey!
thebtskink: :rolleyes:
Frizzo: I am Pete Rose...
Ed Swartzencasiomarolex: That’s good-
Frizzo: -betting against my own team in 1990!
Ed Swahilishinkarolex: Ok--what? No!
Frizzo: Now I’m getting kicked out of baseball and being forced into coaching and living with a killed reputation, never being able to get into the well deserved Hall of Fame.
Ed Shandthatmanabanana: Heh, I think you’re missing the point of the experiment!
Superman: I’m an angry baseball fan who had put all of his faith in Pete Rose and it was all crushed by that non-forgiving stunt he pulled!
Frizzo: Gimme a break man, I was only doing what half of the rest of the country does to make baseball bearable to watch!
Superman: Well damn, did you have to beat against your OWN TEAM?!? That’s real low man, I thought you were the greatest…
Frizzo: Hey, I WAS great, I’m still great! Hell, I’d like to see YOU make a total career hit number of 4,265! Knock yourself out!! Or better yet, let me knock you out!

&lt;Frizzo picks up a bat&gt;

Ed Swahahalanamama: Now wait just a minute!

&lt;Ed Whatchamacallit gets in the way and just in time to get smacked in the head by Frizzo&gt;

Olorin: 4,266.

&lt;Ed’s head starts to bleed profusely&gt;

Ed Whatchamacallit: I...I need--

&lt;Frizzo hands him 5 dollars&gt;

Ed Whahamacalahit: ...no, I need-

&lt;Frizzo puts it away and offers him 10 dollars&gt;

Ed Wouldntyouliketoknow: No...THANKS! But what I really need is-

&lt;Frizzo quiet annoyed now puts the 10 dollars away and pulls out a twenty&gt;
&lt;Blood is now squirting out of Ed’s head&gt;

Ed Bythewaythisisthesameguyeachtime: ....are you NUTS, I don’t want your damn money, I NEED A FRICKING BANDAGE!!
Frizzo: ...you ungrateful bastard!

&lt;Ed Handthismanabanana passes out&gt;

Superman: Yes...well....let’s make teams!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

JBond: So, if someone comes in here, and you’re not sure what’s wrong with them, do you guess and give them a random medication.
Nurse Lace: Please go away...

&lt;Olorin walks in&gt;

Nurse Lace: What’s wrong with you?
JBond: Oh he always looks like that.
Olorin: They....they didn’t want me on their team…
Nurse Lace: What? Are you hurt or not?
Olorin: Yeah I’m hurt! I’ll be emotionally scarred for life!
JBond: Olorin...do you mind...I’m working here! &lt;Bond motions to the nurse&gt;

&lt;Olorin notices Bond’s bloody nose&gt;

Olorin: And it seems to be going well as always.
JBond: Yeah you’re right...Nurse, it’s been fun but I’m going to have to break up with you. Now it may take awhile, but-
Nurse Lace: Ok.
JBond: ...ok let’s go.

&lt;JBond and Olorin walk out into the hallway and all the power goes out&gt;

Olorin: Da hey?

&lt;A guy along with two bodyguards holding guns enters the building and walks in the dark toward Bond and Olorin&gt;

JBond: &lt;squinting in the dark&gt; You know...I think Rick Moranis is coming to kill us!
Olorin: The prophecies are true!
Bill Gates: I’m not Rick Moranis you imbecile! I am the great, BILL GATES!

&lt;Lightning strikes outside. For a split second a man with glasses and a button shirt with a pocket protector raising his arms into the air can be seen in the dark hallway&gt;

Olorin: Oh ok...for a minute there I was worried.

<small>[ 02-20-2002, 10:18 PM: Message edited by: JBond ]</small>

[bbf2]

Ah, so THAT'S where the title comes from!

[JBond]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by bbf2:
<strong>Ah, so THAT'S where the title comes from!</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">:D

[Frizzo the Clown]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by JBond:
<strong>
Frizzo: I am Pete Rose...
Ed Swartzencasiomarolex: That’s good-
Frizzo: -betting against my own team in 1990!
Ed Swahilishinkarolex: Ok--what? No!
Frizzo: Now I’m getting kicked out of baseball and being forced into coaching and living with a killed reputation, never being able to get into the well deserved Hall of Fame.
Ed Shandthatmanabanana: Heh, I think you’re missing the point of the experiment!
Superman: I’m an angry baseball fan who had put all of his faith in Pete Rose and it was all crushed by that non-forgiving stunt he pulled!
Frizzo: Gimme a break man, I was only doing what half of the rest of the country does to make baseball bearable to watch!
Superman: Well damn, did you have to beat against your OWN TEAM?!? That’s real low man, I thought you were the greatest…
Frizzo: Hey, I WAS great, I’m still great! Hell, I’d like to see YOU make a total career hit number of 4,265! Knock yourself out!! Or better yet, let me knock you out!

</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">HAHAHAHAAAAAAAHAHAAAHAHAHAHHAAAAHEE!

[Moe Szyslak]

Very good Jibbs...what part was that? I could count but I'm too lazy.

[JBond]

That was part 5, there are 11 parts.

Oh by the way, this one is by far my longest fanfic!

[TyRoss]

Ahh more brillance. Pete Rose classic stuff.

[thebtskink]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by JBond:
<strong>&lt;Olorin walks in&gt;

Nurse Lace: What’s wrong with you?
JBond: Oh he always looks like that.
Olorin: They....they didn’t want me on their team…
Nurse Lace: What? Are you hurt or not?
Olorin: Yeah I’m hurt! I’ll be emotionally scarred for life!
JBond: Olorin...do you mind...I’m working here! &lt;Bond motions to the nurse&gt;

&lt;Olorin notices Bond’s bloody nose&gt;

Olorin: And it seems to be going well as always.
JBond: Yeah you’re right...Nurse, it’s been fun but I’m going to have to break up with you. Now it may take awhile, but-
Nurse Lace: Ok.
JBond: ...ok let’s go.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Bwahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahah!!!!! and a ha!! :D

[Soccerman]

This stuff is better than a friendly soccer match between Uruguay and Monaco!!!! This is HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!

[JBond]

&lt;We’ll return to the story right after this short commercial break&gt;

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Mrs. Winterspring: We’re real nervous...how long has it been?
Mr. Winterspring: 5 seconds....we’re just not ready for a child, not yet.

&lt;3 minutes later&gt;

Mrs. Winterspring: Honey, it’s blue, I’m pregnant...
Mr. Winterspring: Well....looks like it’s an abortion for you!
Mrs. Winterspring: ...dear, we can discuss this a different time...anyway, you know we’re putting him up for adoption!
Mr. Winterspring: The hell we are! Do you want some child come looking for you years later?! You’re getting an abortion, woman!!
Mrs. Winterspring: Why did I ever marry you?!? I’ll just have this baby on my own!!
Mr. Winterspring: Well, fine!!

&lt;Mrs. Winterspring storms out of the room&gt;

Mr. Winterspring: I slept with the maid!!!

Johnson’s Pregnancy Test...at least you’ll know the truth

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;And now back to the program&gt;

Superman: So pitch the ball already!!
thebtskink: But we lose the ball every time you’re at bat!
Superman: Ye-hehe-ah! I think the last one ended up in Pakistan.

&lt;They look over at the school to see Bill Gates with his bodyguards force JBond and Olorin into a Van&gt;

Frizzo: I always knew they’d go nerd.
thebtskink: Actually I think they’re in trouble.
Superman: It’s no problem, Tech’s around here somewhere, I’m sure he’ll take care of it.

&lt;Tech is seen stealing a bike and pedaling away as fast as he can, Bill Gates’ van gets away&gt;

Frizzo: ....anyone get the plates?
Superman: No
thebtskink: There were plates?
Frizzo: Well I’m out of ideas.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;Tech runs into Mirko’s office huffing&gt;

Mirko: What’s with you.
Tech: &lt;out of breath&gt; I was....riding a...bike.
Mirko: ...bike?
Tech: It’s Olorin and Bond, they were taken!
Mirko: Well what are you doing here? You could have followed them.
Tech: ...yeah I suppose that’s true....hey, who’s that a picture of on your desk, did you get married again?
Mirko: Huh?...Oh. No, I just liked the frame...that picture came with it.
Tech: ......yeah well I better get going now, can I take your car? I’d rather not ride the bike, it’s a girl’s bike.
Mirko: My Cadillac?
Tech: No...you’re other car! :rolleyes:
Mirko: My BMW?
Tech: ...how many cars you got?!

&lt;Mirko opens a drawer that revels 15 sets of keys, he throws Tech one&gt;

Mirko: Take the Benz.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;Tech gets back to the school to find Superman, Frizzo and thebtskink just sitting around&gt;

Tech: What are you guys doing just sitting around for? Don’t you care what happens to Bond and Olorin?
Frizzo: Well, Olorin DOES owe me money!

&lt;Moe Szyslak walks over to the group with a depressed look&gt;

Moe Szyslak: Hey, could one of you guys give me a ride, I need to take my dog to the vet.
Tech: We’re busy, go away.
Moe Szyslak: You wanna be a little more kind to me, my dog was hit by a car, ok?!
Tech: Oh...I’m so sorry.
Moe Szyslak: You don’t have to apologize...it wasn’t your fault...
Tech: Well I hit him on the way here, so it kind of was...
Moe Szyslak: ......
Tech: But hey! No hard feelings?

&lt;Moe whips out a bottle and breaks it in half&gt;

Frizzo: We should really be going, see ya!

&lt;The group gets in the Mercedes&gt;

thebtskink: Nice car...
Tech: Thanks, it’s mine!

&lt;Tech backs up quickly and hits something large&gt;

Superman: This just isn’t your day for driving, is it?

&lt;They get out and go behind the car to find William Shatner dead holding a shotgun&gt;

Tech: ...one down!! WHOO-HOO! Of course Mirko’s not going to like the dent in the car.
Frizzo: I thought it was your car.
Tech: Yeah well uh...times a wasting!

&lt;Tech gets in the car&gt;

Frizzo: I call shotgun!
Superman: Damn...

&lt;Frizzo picks up Shatner’s shotgun and gets in the front seat and the rest get in as well&gt;

Tech: So where we going?
Superman: Well the guy that took them appeared to look kind of like Bill Gates
Frizzo: I don’t know...I’d say more like Rick Moranis.
Tech: Bill Gates you say, that makes sense....we’re going to Redmond, Washington!

&lt;Tech, Superman, Frizzo and thebtskink drive off&gt;

Moe Szyslak: Hey isn’t that William Shatner?

[Moe Szyslak]

Must kill TECH for what he did to me...emotionally.

Good work Jibbs.

[Frizzo the Clown]

Another great installment, man!!

[TyRoss]

Shotgun.. heh.

[Malice]

Nice!

[JBond]

&lt;JBond and Olorin’s hands are tied up behind them while they are locked up in the back of the van going along the road&gt;

JBond: ...
Olorin: ...
JBond: You know this is entirely your fault, don’t you?
Olorin: No, I wasn’t aware of that.
JBond: Well if you would have just given him a wedgie when I gave the signal, we wouldn’t be IN this mess!
Olorin: Oh I’m sorry, I guess I forgot the universal signal for a wedgie! I think I may be able to get out...

&lt;Olorin slips his arms from back and under his feet so his tied hands are now in front of him&gt;

JBond: Nice...not like I’ve never seen that done or anything, but it was still slightly impressive.

&lt;Olorin then starts to chew at the wires around his wrists&gt;

Olorin: Hey this is dental floss! &lt;Chews at it some more&gt; Spearmint...
JBond: Just get out of it!

&lt;Olorin finally gets out and takes the Wintergreen dental floss off of Bond’s hands. Olorin tries to open the door but its locked from the outside&gt;

JBond: Well that was kind of pointless.

&lt;A small window opens up in the front of the van&gt;

Steve Jobs: Hey! You got out of your dental floss! We’re trying to play 2^2 x 5 questions up here!
Bill Gates: Good use of factorization, Steve!
Steve Jobs: Thank you, Bill!

&lt;He shoots Olorin and JBond with tranquilizers&gt;

Steve Jobs: There we go.

&lt;He closes the window&gt;

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;Microsoft Headquarters&gt;

&lt;JBond and Olorin wake up in a cell adjacent to a huge room with computer stations, screens and pretty much just a bunch of electronic stuff&gt;

JBond: How ironic, no windows.
Olorin: Hey...didn’t you have that Bill Gates jail cutter with you, what time did you say it had to be used at?
JBond: 3:47 PM
Olorin: It’s 3:53 PM now.
JBond: Dammit!

&lt;Bill Gates walks out of the bathroom with a string of 100-dollar bills trailing from behind the bottom of his shoe&gt;

Bill Gates: Welcome gentlemen, to the Microsoft Headquarters. You will soon die.
Olorin: Bummer.
Bill Gates: And soon your friends, who will be here soon, will join you as well and die with you.
JBond: What are you up to, Bill.
Bill Gates: I’m not telling...but it’s really cool!
JBond: Please?
Bill Gates: No.
JBond: C’mon!
Bill Gates: Well...ok.
Steve Jobs: Mr. Gates!!
Bill Gates: I mean no! Never! Now excuse me, I have work to do.
JBond: Hey, is that guy over there using a Mac at his station?
Bill Gates: What?!? SOUND THE ALARMS!!!

&lt;The alarms sound and Bill goes over and knocks the man unconscious with a baton. JBond changes his watch to 3:47 PM and cuts open the bars with his Bill Gates jail bar cutter and escapes with Olorin&gt;

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Superman: Well there it is...Nerd Central
thebtskink: Now how do you know this is where Olorin and Bond were taken?
Tech: We’ve noticed for weeks now of suspicious activity coming from Microsoft.
Superman: Such as?
Tech: Orders of raw materials, engineers, banned from society scientists, shipments of C4.
thebtskink: Typical school project, eh? What the hell do they need with Bond and Olorin.
Superman: Well as long as they take them off of our hands for a while.
Tech: ...where’s Frizzo?

&lt;At a Mobil gas station 25 miles back, Frizzo walks out drinking a Pepsi&gt;

Frizzo: ...guys?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Olorin: Do you know where you’re going?
JBond: Of course not.

&lt;They walk by an open door and peer inside&gt;

Con-Air: Ok ok, I got it. “Windows Advanced”
TyRoss: Nah, too much like the Game Boy Advanced.
Con-Air: That’s true...ok, how about “Windows Me”
TyRoss: You idiot, we already have one named that, and you came up with it!
Con-Air: Oh right...”Windows 02”?
TyRoss: ...you....are a genius.
Con-Air: These ideas just come to me.

Olorin: Kill me!

&lt;JBond grabs some papers and they walk further down&gt;

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Frizzo: You know...when the time comes that we go on a trip like this and I’m driving...I’ll make sure to leave you in the middle of NOWHERE! Well I hope you fell real guilty now...
thebtskink: Hey this car has satellite TV!
Tech: There it is...again, Microsoft.
Superman: I suppose we just drive in...me, a clown, and this guy with worms in his pockets...just like that?
Tech: ...You have another idea?
Superman: Hey...they don’t call me Super Genius for nothing!
thebtskink: Who calls you that?
Superman: ...people.....stupid people...
Frizzo: So what’s your idea?
Superman: Well it’s quite amazing actually, observe!

&lt;Superman opens the window with the wonderful automatic window opener and flies out and up and over into the Microsoft complex&gt;

Frizzo: You know...I really thought I would see that coming the next time.
Tech: So...he’s going to open the doors for us and come back?
Frizzo: You don’t spend much time with Superman...do you?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Olorin: So what’s in the papers you grabbed?
JBond: Not much...hmm, here’s something. &lt;Bond reads from a piece of paper&gt; “8 packages of C4, 1 remote detonator, 3 1/2 barrels of gunpowder, let sit for 1 hour, then enjoy”
Olorin: Yep, it’s a recipe for disaster.

&lt;JBond starts to open a door&gt;

Olorin: Bond! You can’t go in there!!
JBond: Why not?!
Olorin: It says Top Secret! You’re a secret agent, you should know better!
JBond: ...what the hell did you just say?

&lt;JBond walks in and Olorin follows. In the middle of the large room is a telephone booth shaped chamber with many computers encircling it all about 10 feet away from it. No one is in the room&gt;

JBond: Where do you suppose everyone went, you would think they wouldn’t leave something that...important looking unattended.

&lt;A guy and a girl in Microsoft uniforms [use your imagination] enter the room and see Olorin and JBond in the room&gt;

Olorin: Maybe you should ask them.

[TyRoss]

Truly still hilarious. And I have a cameo I'm honored.

[thebtskink]

Hill-arious!

[Knerys]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by JBond:
<strong>

JBond: ...
Olorin: ...
JBond: You know this is entirely your fault, don’t you?
Olorin: No, I wasn’t aware of that.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">For some reason I couldn't stopping laughing at this.

Great job. Cs! comedy at it's best.

[JBond]

&lt;Tech drives to the front gate and a guard steps in front of the car blocking them&gt;

Kyle Katarn: May I see your pass, Sir?
Tech: Um...my pass...yeah, it’s right here!

&lt;Tech floors the car while laughing&gt;

Kyle Katarn: Maybe you should try to take it out of Park first! :rolleyes:
Tech: Oh yeah, thanks.

&lt;Tech puts it in drive and smacks into Kyle causing him to fly in the air over the car landing on the other side&gt;

Kyle Katarn: Gaaaaaaaa!
Tech: Sorry!

&lt;The team drives into the parking lot and finds a spot...G56 to be exact&gt;

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Tyler Durden: What are you doing in here? Do you work here?
JBond: Yes.
Olorin: No.
Tyler Durden: Seize them Foxy Laidi!

&lt;Olorin pulls a fire hydrant from off the wall and hits Tyler in the head, he falls over unconscious&gt;

Foxy Laidi: Don’t hurt me! I only work here part time!

&lt;JBond and Foxy Laidi’s eyes meet, romantic music plays, and they smile and run away in the same direction giggling&gt;

Olorin: ...he should be sedated.

&lt;A crackling noise is heard over the PA system and then a voice&gt;

Superman: Olorin, Bond, this is Superman, I made it!
Con-Air: Hey! Give back that microphone, you don’t belong here!
Superman: Back nerds, BACK! Anyway I’ll get you out of here soon.

&lt;PA system turns off&gt;

Olorin: Booya!

&lt;PA system turns back on&gt;

Superman: You stole that from me!

&lt;PA system turns back off&gt;

Olorin: ...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;Superman now in the complex avoiding guards hears some noise behind a door and walks in finding Bond and the evil Microsoft woman making out&gt;

Superman: Bond!!
JBond: &lt;Shocked&gt; Superman! This is exactly how it looks!
Superman: Bond, you should be ashamed!...I know you aren’t, but you should be!
JBond: Oh come on, it’s not that bad! I mean, take away her gun and her Microsoft outfit and what is she?
Superman: Naked?
JBond: Yeeeeeeah....

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;Meanwhile&gt;

Steve Jobs: Don’t worry Bill, our guards will find those guys. In the meantime, I need your help on something. We’ve devised this new cell to keep prisoners in since the others were too easy to get out. We have it all done, except we need you to be able to answer questions that prisoners might have when they find themselves in the cell. But because the room is so secure, we can’t have wires going through from you to them so we have created a machine that will go in the cell that will hear their questions and give pre-recorded answers that you will now give. So listen to these possible questions and after the ‘click’, give an answer.
Bill Gates: Ok

Recording: Where am I?

&lt;click&gt;

Bill Gates: You are at Microsoft headquarters, welcome to hell!
Steve Jobs: Oooo, I like it!

Recording: You’ll never get away with this!

&lt;click&gt;

Bill Gates: BWAHAHAHAHA!!

Recording: Man, I wish I had brought clean underpants.

&lt;click&gt;

Bill Gates: ......what the hell kind of question is that?!? Would you just leave me alone, I have a lot work to do for my competitor destruction project! Go get me file #756!
Steve Jobs: Sorry Sir...you want me to get you a hot cocoa with that?
Bill Gates: Damn straight!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

thebtskink: So what...you’ve hit about 3 things now with the car?
Tech: Hey, we’re in aren’t we?
Frizzo: Yeah don’t sweat it Tech, thebtskink here once hit 10 people in one day!
thebtskink: Mimes Frizzo, mimes! They’re not people! I was trying to beat Bond’s record...

&lt;The three get out of the car and start to walk to the door when suddenly 6 guards jump out from the shadows and surround them. Frizzo pulls out a rubber chicken and a slingshot&gt;

Guard #1: Drop it!

&lt;Frizzo drops the items and put up his hands as so does everyone else. The guards take them into the complex and lock them away&gt;

[Knerys]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by JBond:
<strong>

&lt;JBond and Foxy Laidi’s eyes meet, romantic music plays, and they smile and run away in the same direction giggling&gt;

Olorin: ...he should be sedated.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Ha Ha Ha!

This is definitely the best installment by far! I laughed...I cried...because I laughed so hard...and I laughed some more. Nicely done. :D

[JBond]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Knerys:
<strong> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by JBond:
<strong>

&lt;JBond and Foxy Laidi’s eyes meet, romantic music plays, and they smile and run away in the same direction giggling&gt;

Olorin: ...he should be sedated.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Ha Ha Ha!

This is definitely the best installment by far! I laughed...I cried...because I laughed so hard...and I laughed some more. Nicely done. :D </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Thank you <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" />

[Link]

Hah great part! Foxy Laidi

[TyRoss]

Heh a triumph of the human spirit. Everyone should read this.

[thebtskink]

Mimes aren't people... poetic, in a way.

[slinger]

Great stuff. It will be hard for anyone to top this work.

[Frizzo the Clown]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by thebtskink:
<strong>Mimes aren't people... poetic, in a way.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Mimes are the bastard cousins of clowns....they make great politcal assasins though...even if they get caught, they never make a sound....

[JBond]

Tech: And here we are...a completely sealed up room...I wish Superman was here...then I could tease him about not being able to fly out!
thebtskink: Maybe we can get out of the ceiling...I see a spot that we might be able to slip through.
Frizzo: Could we fit through that?!
thebtskink: Maybe...maybe not...hence, MAYBE!
Tech: Worth a shot, let’s stack up.

&lt;Frizzo stands on Tech’s shoulders and thebtskink starts to climb up them, slips and falls back catching Frizzo’s pants revealing American flag boxers&gt;

Frizzo: Um....USA, USA!!...man, I wish I had brought clean underpants...

&lt;click&gt;

Bill Gates: ......what the hell kind of question is that?!? Would you just leave me alone, I have a lot work to do for my competitor destruction project! Go get me file #756!

&lt;click&gt;

Frizzo: ......
Tech: File #756...thanks Gates!
thebtskink: What the hell was that?
Tech: A mistake, but useful for us!
Frizzo: Yes...look at us here locked in this room...so useful.

&lt;Just then, noises are heard from the large metal door&gt;

thebtskink: Oh no, they’ve come to kill us!

&lt;Frizzo pulls his pants back up&gt;
&lt;The door opens&gt;

Olorin: Wazzuuuuup! &lt;thebtskink hits Olorin over the head with a shoe and he falls over&gt;
Tech: It’s Olorin! He’s set us free! ...you ok, Olorin?
Olorin: ......
thebtskink: Whoops, I think he’s unconscious.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;Olorin wakes up groggy against the wall of the cell with a note on his leg&gt;

To Olorin,

Thanks for rescuing us and all, we would have waited for you but we didn’t want Bill Gates or one of his guards to find us broken out of the cell. Hope you understand. Thebtskink apologizes for hitting you with his shoe.

Good luck, Frizzo.

Olorin: Motherf-
Guard: Hey! What are you doing?! Where are the others!?

&lt;Olorin stands up&gt;

Olorin: I don’t know where they are.
Guard: Don’t play dumb with me, they’re your partners, you have to know where they are!
Olorin: You would think that.
Guard: Well I guess Gates will be happy if at least one of you dies...

&lt;The guard pulls out a pistol&gt;

Olorin: Um, look out behind you! A shoe!
Guard: I’m not falling for that old trick!

&lt;The guard aims his gun at Olorin and a shoe hits him in the back of the head and he plummets to the ground. Olorin sees thebtskink wearing one shoe standing with the others about 50 feet away&gt;

Tech: Wow...you’re getting pretty good with that shoe.

&lt;Thebtskink, Frizzo and Tech walk up to Olorin. Olorin picks up the shoe&gt;

thebtskink: Thanks! &lt;Olorin hits him in the head with the shoe and hands it to him&gt;
Olorin: No problem! At least you came back for me.
Tech: Yeah...well you’re a good friend and we knew we had to come back for you.
Frizzo: Actually we’re dead lost and we must have gone in a circle back to here...but you’re still a good friend!
Olorin: Gee, thanks.
Tech: We should go now, I need to find a computer...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;Superman runs into Bond&gt;

Superman: Bond!
JBond: Hey! Glad you could make it...where are the others?
Superman: I don’t know, they’re so slow! I’m sure they’re fine.
JBond: Here, follow me. Olorin and I found something cool.
Superman: Ah, so where is Olorin?
JBond: Um...&lt;turns around&gt; well shoot, he was here a minute ago...
Superman: You left someone behind?! I’m so disappointed in you.
JBond: He’s fine....let’s go.

&lt;Bond and Superman walk into the room with the telephone booth looking thing&gt;

Superman: Very nice...what is it?
JBond: Well...I don’t know, but it has something to do with Gates’ plan for world domination.
Superman: World Domination?! Wow, Bill Gates never seemed like the power freak kind of...never mind.
JBond: Let’s take a closer look...

&lt;Bond and Superman get in the contraption&gt;

Superman: Kind of cold.
JBond: Be quiet...hey look at this, this computer has options for day, months and years! Do you know what this is...
Superman: My God...he’s done it...he has created an electronic calendar.
JBond: No, this is a time machine! He must be planning to destroy something in the past!

Bill Gates: Congratulations Mr. Bond, you’ve solved it. Be sure to tell future generations of how the great Bill Gates started his reign!

&lt;Bill Gates presses a few buttons and sends Bond and Superman into another time&gt;

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;Bond and Superman, now in a different year look around to find themselves not in a building, but in a town square with a fountain and trees and people walking around with very strange clothes&gt;

Superman: Must be the future...
JBond: Hey, look at this.

&lt;JBond points to a plaque that reads as follows&gt;

Here lies the site where the once mighty Bill Gates held his great Microsoft corporation until the great society of INSANE (shut down years later for tax evasion) stopped the megalomaniac from his evil ways over a hundred years ago. The members included Mirko, Tech, JBond (who eventually dies after falling down the stairs), Frizzo the Clown, and thebtskink.

Superman: What?! They mention Frizzo but not me?!?
JBond: At least we know we succeed!....falling down the stairs?! Why would they even mention that...
Superman: Could be worse...well, no not really.
JBond: Over a hundred years ago it says...it must be about 2100.
Superman: Brilliant, Holmes.
JBond: Well...this place doesn’t look very different...quite peaceful actually.

&lt;JBond looks over to see someone walking by and apparently talking to himself&gt;

Link: No, don’t do that...well of course, you’re an idiot!.....Just leave me alone!

Superman: I think there’s an abundance of lunatics in the future.
JBond: Hey...who are you talking to!?
Link: I’m the phone of course!
JBond: Uh...excuse us, we’re not from around here. But how are you on the phone.
Link: I’m using the one built in my head of course...pretty standard.
Superman: So um...what year is it?
Link: What year is it?! It’s the year 141!
JBond: What? 141? What are you talking about, it has to be at least the year 2100!
Link: Oh...well if you go by the old year system it is 2123...but no one uses that anymore.
Superman: Why is it called 141 now?
Link: What...were you born five minutes ago?!?
JBond: More or less.
Link: The year of 1 A.B. is the year our Lord Britney graced her heavenly presence on this planet! It was the start of the Britney Era!
Superman: ...Britney SPEARS!
Link: Don’t take thy Lord’s name in vain!
JBond: What in the hell kind of alternate universe is this...
Superman: An alternate one at that!
Link: If you didn’t know, In the year “2005” the Great Britney brought us all in harmony from her great music and wonderful and inspiring poetry!
JBond: Are we talking about the same Britney here? The same one that dresses in slutty outfits and prances around?!

&lt;Link slaps Bond&gt;

Link: How dare you!! Blasphemy!

&lt;Link walks away furious as ever&gt;

JBond: Wow....I’m glad I didn’t tell him I slept with her.

<small>[ 02-24-2002, 10:04 PM: Message edited by: JBond ]</small>

[Knerys]

Oh God...Britney's ruling the world! We're doomed. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="eek.gif" />

Still very funny though. :D

[Moe Szyslak]

JBond: Be quiet...hey look at this, this computer has options for day, months and years! Do you know what this is...

Superman: My God...he’s done it...he has created an electronic calendar.

Hehe, I like...story good. Bond funny. :D

[TyRoss]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Frizzo the Clown:
<strong>Mimes are the bastard cousins of clowns....they make great politcal assasins though...even if they get caught, they never make a sound....</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Hmmmm so if they strap a bomb to themselves does it make a noise as it explodes? Oh and another great episode Bond. Our Lord Britney eh... does that make Christina one of the Apostles??

[thebtskink]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Moe Szyslak:
<strong>JBond: Be quiet...hey look at this, this computer has options for day, months and years! Do you know what this is...

Superman: My God...he’s done it...he has created an electronic calendar.

Hehe, I like...story good. Bond funny. :D </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">DITTO

[Soccerman]

Freaking Hilarious, JBond!!!!!!!!! You are truly an inspiration to us all. Especially since you are obviously a man of impeccable taste!

.......mmmmmmm.........Britney.......

...

...

......mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.......

:D

[JBond]

&lt;They see another person walk by&gt;

Madness IV: Dammit....no, I can’t...don’t SAY that....ARGH!

Superman: Another angry cell phone user...things aren’t that different.

Madness IV: You should go the store...why should I...cause I said so...make me...maybe I WILL...well FINE, DO THAT!

&lt;Madness IV starts to hit himself and knocks his hat right off&gt;

JBond: ..I don’t think he’s on the phone.
Superman: Well...we better get going. I noticed the time machine did not come with us...but if Bill Gates could design a time machine 100 years ago, they’ve got to be like mass produced by now...

&lt;JBond and Superman walk away&gt;

Link: What a strange pair of guys...
Madness IV: Yep...&lt;Madness hits himself causing his hat to fall off again&gt;...Oops.
Link: Don’t say it!
Madness: I did it again!
Both: HAHAHAHA!!!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;121 years ago, Tech, Frizzo, thebtskink and Olorin are in a room with computers while Frizzo looks out for guards who are obviously not very good at searching&gt;

Tech: Ok...first we log in to here and...shoot....thebtskink, if you were a nerdy leader of a software company...what would your password be?
thebtskink: I don’t know...X-Files, Calculus_is_cool, 100101101, I_am_God
Tech: Ah-HA! Got it, it was the last one.
Frizzo: Bastard stole my password...
Tech: Ok, here it is.

File #756

(Latest entry)

The plans are going as planned. With the capture of Olorin and JBond we now have adequate test subjects for the Microsoft Time Machine 2.1. Not to mention I’ll be rid of two of the INSANE members. The shipments of C4 came in which will be set at Apple Computers Inc. before they have had much of an advancement back in the past. This WILL transform Microsoft here in the present to become the most powerful company ever so I can fulfill my wishes of world domination...hehe...HAHA.....BWAHAHAHAHA!!!

Olorin: I can’t believe he actually added that in there!!
Tech: It’s clear what we must do now...
thebtskink: Invest in Microsoft?
Tech: No! We must stop him from going into the past!
Olorin: Earlier Bond and I saw this telephone booth shaped ting, I bet that was the time machine.
Frizzo: Could it have been a telephone booth?
Olorin: ...you just don’t know when to shut up, do you?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

&lt;141 A.B.&gt;
&lt;Superman and JBond walk into a computer shop&gt;

JBond: Uh hi, we’re looking for...a Microsoft time machine?
silent speech: ...HAHAHAHA! A Microsoft time machine!!
Superman: Me thinks they don’t have time machines yet...
silent speech: Why the hell would you want a Microsoft one?! That’s like asking for a holographic hooker without pleasure feedback systems!
JBond: I was born in the wrong time...
silent speech: No no, you’d be much better of with an Atari Time Traveler™.
Superman: Atari, huh...
silent speech: Yep, for a low, low price of only 79,999.99!!
JBond: Do you take MasterCard?
silent speech: You betcha!

&lt;JBond hands him his credit card&gt;

silent speech: ......um, this is kind of expired.
JBond: Well the damn credit card company won’t send me new ones!
silent speech: Uh huh...got anything else?

&lt;JBond pulls out a twenty dollar bill&gt;

JBond: All I got is this.
silent speech: WOW! Who is that on the bill?! That’s not Britney Spears?!
Superman: Oh God...
JBond: It’s President Jackson...he pre-dates Britney.
silent speech: Wow...tell you what, I’ll give you a time machine if you give me that bill.
JBond: It’s a deal!

&lt;Bond hands him the bill and takes a small box from him and then leaves with Superman&gt;

silent speech: Sucker!

JBond: Sucker!
Superman: So what...the time machine is in the box?!

&lt;they open it up and there is a gun with a place to set the time&gt;

JBond: Guess so.

&lt;Back in 2002&gt;

&lt;Tech, Frizzo, Olorin and thebtskink go back to the time machine room to see Bill Gates in it with his explosives&gt;

Bill Gates: Hahaha, you are too late! &lt;Gates starts to fade away&gt;
Olorin: Oopsy! &lt;Olorin pushes some buttons and switches the time&gt;
Bill Gates: Noooo....
thebtskink: Haha, quick thinking, Olorin! Where’d you send him to?
Olorin: Oh I don’t know, I just pressed a few buttons, I think sometime way in the future!
Tech: Well I guess that’s that, let’s go back and report!

&lt;They go back to INSANE Headquarters&gt;

Mirko: So, did you find William Shatner?!
Tech: Who? Oh! Um, yeah he’s taken care of...isn’t he guys?
Frizzo: Tech hit him with your car.
thebtskink: Made a big dent.
Tech: Thanks guys...
Mirko: Well....as long as you got him....that’s of course coming out of your paycheck, Tech.
Tech: Does this mean you’re going to pay me this week!
Mirko: ...nevermind....where’s Bond and Superman?

&lt;Tech looks behind himself&gt;

Tech: Hmmm...
thebtskink: Do you want me to check the car?

<small>[ 02-25-2002, 05:54 PM: Message edited by: JBond ]</small>

[Link]

Britney will pose nude any time soon..

Great part Jbond..

[JBond]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Link:
<strong>Britney will pose nude any time soon..</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Why did you post that? :confused:

[Knerys]

Goodness gracious, Madness actually had children! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="eek.gif" />

[Frizzo the Clown]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by JBond:
<strong>
Tech: Ok...first we log in to here and...shoot....thebtskink, if you were a nerdy leader of a software company...what would your password be?
thebtskink: I don’t know...X-Files, Calculus_is_cool, 100101101, I_am_God
Tech: Ah-HA! Got it, it was the last one.
Frizzo: Bastard stole my password...
</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">HAHA!! But the joke is on you! Thats not really my password!! :D

[Knerys]

That's not what you said last night. :D <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" />

[Frizzo the Clown]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Knerys:
<strong>That's not what you said last night. :D <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Um....well, I talk in my sleep...and I lie when I do it!! :D

[Moe Szyslak]

Tech: It’s clear what we must do now...
thebtskink: Invest in Microsoft?

Why do the little things make me laugh?

[Frizzo the Clown]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Moe Szyslak:
<strong>Tech: It’s clear what we must do now...
thebtskink: Invest in Microsoft?

Why do the little things make me laugh?</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Because you're simple-minded?

[TyRoss]

And as the complexities of the plot unravel, will JBond and Supes make it back in time? Will Bill Gates take over the future? Will I ever stop asking these questions??? Tune in tommorrow. Same Bat-Time, Same Bat Channel.

[Knerys]

I didn't know Batman was in this story.

[JBond]

I will post the final part tomorrow

[Knerys]

I shiver with antici.......pation.

[TyRoss]

So whattaya waitin' for get on with it.

[JBond]

The final part!!

&lt;JBond and Superman are walking along and Bill Gates appears in front of them with armfuls of explosives&gt;

Superman: ...Got a match, Bond?
Bill Gates: YOU two! &lt;Gates drops all of the explosives and pulls out a gun&gt;
JBond: Heh, that looks a lot like my gun!

&lt;JBond feels around for his gun&gt;

JBond: Ah *****.
Superman: Hey Bond, doesn’t your gun only work for you?
JBond: Well no...not that one....THAT one has a built in radio.
Bill Gates: Hahaha, wonderful...I’ll be listening to polka over your dead bodies, and using your bones as an accordion!
Superman: ...You’ll do what?
Bill Gates: Um...you’re going to die a horrible, horrible death! OK?!

&lt;Bill Gates is about to shoot Superman when a person warps into the future behind Bill&gt;

Mrs. Gates: Huh! What are you DOING Billy! Put down that weapon at ONCE!
Bill Gates: .....mom?! What the hell are you doing here?!
Mrs. Gates: You watch your mouth young man, you were suppose to clean your room 5 DAYS ago, and-
Bill Gates: I said I’d do it!!
Mrs. Gates: Don’t snap back at me! You are going RIGHT back and cleaning your room and that is THAT!
Superman: Haha, you nerd.
Mrs. Gates: YOU STAY OUT OF THIS!!
Superman: Sorry Ma’am...
Mrs. Gates: &lt;Grabs Billy’s ear&gt; I had to cook over a hot stove and yell my head off at your father to get him to drive you to those math meets and this is how you repay me! Someday I’ll be long gone and you will be the same mischievous little boy going off about “world domination”, well a world leader has to do his chores and not ignore his mother. You used to call me EVERY day when you were young, now I’m lucky to get a call from you every MONTH! THEN you invite your FRIENDS over and they make a HUUUUGE mess all over the place with those damn X-Men trading cards and you don’t even clean them up causing me-

&lt;JBond zaps Mrs. Gates with the Atari Time Traveler™ gun&gt;

Mr. Gates: Wow, THANKS man!
JBond: I didn’t do it for you.

&lt;Bill Gates points the gun back at him, Bond points the Time Traveler™ at Gates&gt;

Bill Gates: Don’t even think about! You wouldn’t have enough time before I’d kill you if you shot me with that!
JBond: On the contrary, I have all the time in the world!

&lt;JBond sets the date and shoots himself and he fades out&gt;

Superman: Bastard!

&lt;Bond appears behind Bill Gates with frizzled clothes, lipstick on his cheeks and beads around his neck&gt;

Superman: *sigh*

&lt;Bond then tries to shoot Gates with the Time Traveler™ but it doesn’t work&gt;

JBond: Dammit!

&lt;Bill Gates swings around and aims at Bond but Bond quickly hits him down and runs and hijacks a car and Superman gets in&gt;

Superman: Made a little pit stop I see!
JBond: Yeah well, I had the time.

&lt;JBond and Superman speed away as Bill Gates steals a car as well with a big dome on it&gt;

Superman: He’s gaining on us! Can’t you go any faster!
JBond: I’m sorry, I’ve never driven a car like this!
Superman: Does the gun work yet?
JBond: No, it’s still messed up.

&lt;Bill Gates gets right up behind them and rams there car causing it to swerve off the road and go right for a tree&gt;

Superman: Crap!

&lt;The tree turns out to be a hologram&gt;

JBond: Yes! Haha!

&lt;Bond aims for another tree and it turns out to be real and the car knocks it over, totaling the car in the process. They crawl out and see a piece of a sign on the hood of the car&gt;

“Here lies the last of the remaining trees on the Earth”

Superman: Nice.

&lt;Gates appears behind them in his domed car and gets out with the gun aimed at Bond&gt;

Bill Gates: No more funny stuff, time to die. &lt;Gates pulls the trigger and the radio turns on&gt;

&lt;Woman’s voice&gt; “Goo goo g’joob, goo goo g’joob......goo goo g’joob, goo goo g’joob goooo....chuba chuba chuba...chuba...chuba......chuba chuba.”

Announcer: That is such a great song, that song was of course Lord Britney’s cover of The Beatles hit ‘I am the Walrus’...but we all know John Lennon copied that from Mrs. Spears! Up next, Britney Spears’ “cover” of The Who’s “My Generation”...sponsored by Pepsi

&lt;Superman crushes the radio&gt;

JBond: I hope I die before I get old...

&lt;In Bill Gates’ confusion, Bond kicks him and steals the gun and forces Bill Gates into the domed car and fires at the lock so he can’t get out&gt;

Bill Gates: What are you going to do!
JBond: You’re going down! Sorry, but that’s life!
Superman: Or death in your case, Bill!

&lt;Bond pushes the doomed...I’m sorry, that’s “domed” car and causes it to roll down a hill into the ocean&gt;

Superman: Nice job...of course, he will eventually get out of there and can cause more damage.

&lt;Bond remembers the radio&gt;

JBond: This place could use some damage, it won’t hurt us back at home.
Superman: Speaking of which, does the Time Traveler™ work yet?
JBond: Yeah it should, I changed the batteries.

&lt;Sure enough the Time Traveler™ works and they eventually time travel back to 2002&gt;

&lt;At INSANE Headquarters, Bond and Superman walk in&gt;

thebtskink: Bond! Superman! You guys made it! Where have you been?
JBond: In the year 141.
Olorin: I thought Gates sent you to the future?
JBond: Oh, well Britney-

&lt;Superman silences Bond and whispers to him&gt;

Superman: They shouldn’t have to go through the anguish that we will now suffer the rest of our lives!
JBond: ...I meant 2123.
Superman: Where’s Tech?
Mirko: In his office.

&lt;Superman sees Tech at his desk replacing the stickers on his Rubik Cube&gt;

Tech: Good as new!
Superman: Hey Tech, sorry about ditching you guys when we we’re approaching the Microsoft complex, but I’m sure you got in ok.
Tech: We we’re captured.
Superman: Oh.....darn

&lt;Everyone walks into Tech’s office&gt;

Mirko: Bond told me what happened, can’t Bill Gates just get a new time machine from that shop you went to?
Superman: Not likely, before we left we took his explosives and blew up the room in the present with the time machine. That will set back time travel research for a LONG time!
Mirko: Well good work, all of you. I’m sorry for calling you stupid and sending you to school and all. I’d be glad for you to go to a associate party with me on Friday!
Olorin: I’d love to but I got detention...
JBond: Yeah that’d be great, but isn’t William Shatner still out there?
Frizzo: Tech hit him with Mirko’s car and left a dent. He died.
Tech: You just won’t shut up...
JBond: He’s dead? Seriously?!
Frizzo: Well yeah, it was a pretty serious death...
Mirko: Congrats on getting rid of Gates, Bond.
JBond: Thanks, it was fun!
thebtskink: Yeah, I bet it WAS!
JBond: ...what?
thebtskink: Nothing...
Tech: Did I do good, Mirks?
Mirko: You hits three things with my Benz...don’t quit your day job.
Tech: This is my day job...

&lt;Superman’s phone rings&gt;

Superman: Crap, parole officer again...Hello!....where was I? Not far...
Mirko: I wonder if this is on the news...&lt;Mirko turns on the TV&gt;

Announcer: And in other news, Microsoft founder and President Bill Gates is still missing.
Mrs. Gates: That boy has ALWAYS been a troublemaker, when he was 5 he hacked into the Toys R Us computer and had 5 of everything sent to his house and the FBI sent me to jail and gave him a job! It’s insane! That boy is getting a good whipping when he gets back from the future!

Frizzo: Wow, cut the umbilical cord already!

Announcer: The future?...

&lt;Mirko turns off the TV&gt;

Mirko: Alright, let’s go out for burgers, my treat!

&lt;And the whole gang walks out of the building carefree not knowing what or when there next adventure will be&gt;

&lt;rOb dies&gt;

The End

<small>[ 02-27-2002, 09:03 PM: Message edited by: JBond ]</small>

[Frizzo the Clown]

Bravo! Bravo! Great stuff, JB!

[Moe Szyslak]

rOb dies? Am I missing something here?

[JBond]

I guess so, rOb was always complaing about dying in my fanfics... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" />

[Knerys]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by JBond:
<strong>

Announcer: That is such a great song, that song was of course Lord Britney’s cover of The Beatles hit ‘I am the Walrus’...but we all know John Lennon copied that from Mrs. Spears!
</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Blasphemy, I tell you, BLASPHEMY!!!

Good work JBond. :D

[Olorin]

What? No walking into the sunset? WHAT A WASTE OF TIME, WHEN THE HEROES CAN'T EVEN WALK INTO A DECENT SUNSET!

(by the way, that's a bad joke, and jibbs is hilarious)

[TyRoss]

(applause)(more applause)(raucous applause)(downright rowdy applause)(Jerry Spinger Show applause)

[Link]

William Shatner died yet they can't kill Regis..

Great ending..

[Soccerman]

When I think of the great writers of the past century, I think of Shakespeare, Hemingway, Tolstoy, and now JBond. Bravo, old chap.

[JBond]

Thank you all.

[thebtskink]

yes, it WAS a good fanfic. Good job making fun of my bad, bad jokes.

and great job overall.

[JBond]

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by thebtskink:
<strong>Good job making fun of my bad, bad jokes.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">What do you mean?

[thebtskink]

I thought me flipping out saying WAS was a criticism of me flipping out all the time and you not getting it. But I guess I was wrong in my flipping out, and you didn't get me. In the future, I will try not to flip out, so that you may, one day, get me.

[slinger]

Wow a ending just like on TV.

[Tardumb]

Another great installment! Hilarious stuff Bond...It definently wasn't a waste of my time...*clap clap clap*

*clap*

[JBond]

Thank you

[JBond]

Yep need this one too.